"Murray's out" shouted my wife as I walked in the door
"Scottish and now gay, he's not had the best of luck has he" I replied
"Scottish and now gay, he's not had the best of luck has he" I replied
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Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. -
I told my mate, "Saw some of the living dead today."
"You mean you watched a film." He asserted.
"No, I went through Worthing." I replied.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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After seeing that old bloke coming out of court this week guilty of those sex assault charges, I've decided to boycott KFC from now on.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Whenever anyone asks me what I do for a living I tell them I'm a gynecologist.
I'm really a cloakroom assistant in the Houses of Parliament but it's the same thing, I spend all day looking at c**ts.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Blimey, the way things are going at the moment - the BBC won't have any footage left of the 60s, 70s or 80s.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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One way or another I'm going to have to stop quoting Blondie lyrics.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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A woman has given birth outside the Primark in Birmingham, with staff helping deliver the child and promptly putting it to work.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Called a plumber out the other day. He was Chinese.
Called a builder, he was also Chinese.
Called an electrician out. He was Chinese as well !
Bloody Yellow PagesAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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I tried to buy a medieval punishment device recently, but I had no luck.
Everywhere was out of stocks.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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The Williams sisters had to forfeit their double match today, as Serena wasn't feeling too well.
I'm guessing men's problems.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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