Farting Risk Analysis

[Mich the Tester]

N'night

I can't give you any positive rep, so

UPDATE: there are now trucks outside setting up a fairground on the village green, so to cancel out the noise of diesel engines I have had to shut the window. You will know tomorrow morning whether I have died of methane poisoning.

[SueEllen]

UPDATE: there are now trucks outside setting up a fairground on the village green, so to cancel out the noise of diesel engines I have had to shut the window. You will know tomorrow morning whether I have died of methane poisoning.

I don't think you can kill yourself with your own farts.

Then again I've not stayed in the room if they are that bad.

[mudskipper]

I don't think you can kill yourself with your own farts.

Then again I've not stayed in the room if they are that bad.

If you stay in the room, you become acclimatised.

It's when you leave to have a pee, then come back in, that it knocks you out.

[Wanderer]

Have I missed any risks and mitigations?

Farts don't smell if you light them.

Whip out a cigarette lighter, cock one leg in the air and light that bad boy up as you let it rip. It produces a nice warm feeling in your anus but you have to watch it if you do a particularly long one because you can get a bit of a backdraft and an overly warm sensation. I can also inform you that you shouldn't do this in the computer room where they have highly sensitive fire detection equipment.

[doodab]

To the original list I would like to add the crowded public place risk, where complete strangers take exception. Just the other week I was standing outside of a shop waiting for a friend and a young lady, who was a good six feet away, got quite upset and called me a 'joker'. I'm now on a rather crowded train and while I'm fairly certain I could get away with it as another train passes I'd be wary of letting rip in a station.

[MaryPoppins]

UPDATE: there are now trucks outside setting up a fairground on the village green, so to cancel out the noise of diesel engines I have had to shut the window. You will know tomorrow morning whether I have died of methane poisoning.

Are you dead?

[Mich the Tester]

Well once the fairground trucks switched off their engines at about 2 AM I got up and opened the window; the room was more than a little smelly but was quickly freshened up by a blast of cold air. Saw the priest from the next room this morning and he was looking a bit worse for wear; as I didn't see him in the bar yesterday I presume he either; went off for some drinkies somewhere else, or suffered a minor case of cranial oxygen shortage. I hope it was the first.

[MaryPoppins]

Well once the fairground trucks switched off their engines at about 2 AM I got up and opened the window; the room was more than a little smelly but was quickly freshened up by a blast of cold air. Saw the priest from the next room this morning and he was looking a bit worse for wear; as I didn't see him in the bar yesterday I presume he either; went off for some drinkies somewhere else, or suffered a minor case of cranial oxygen shortage. I hope it was the first.

Poor bloke. If there is anyone going in to clean your room, I feel sorry for them.

[Mich the Tester]

Poor bloke. If there is anyone going in to clean your room, I feel sorry for them.

Yep, it'll be freezing as I left both windows wide open.

[MaryPoppins]

Yep, it'll be freezing as I left both windows wide open.

Very considerate. Well done on surviving the night MTT.