(More) Really stupid things you've done

[Old Hack]

Over the summer holidays we went on a long trip in the motorhome. Those familiar with France, would know getting into a campsite, one doesn't know the type of electricity you're going to get, and whether the polarity is revered. So getting in, we'd simply check the polarity, then reverse the wiring in the hook up cable.

In the fourth week, it just became second nature. However, on a site on the Ile de Rey, I was checking the polarity, and noticed it was reversed there, and was just about to unplug the thing, and swap the wires, when I noticed two nice looking French ladies camped next to us, an enchanté exchanged and a flirty look the French women have, which means 1,000,000 things, including you disgust me (probable), I had completely forgotten what I was doing and simply started changing the polarity without first unplugging it. The women were really alarmed at the noise I made for about 2 minutes before my wife came out to see the fuss.

Women hey...

[SimonMac]

I was down to the last two for a permie gig, after his interview the other candidate walked straight into a glass door and knocked himself out cold, I got the job.

[Gibbon]

Back in the nineties. on exercise, Tornado F3 night time black out scramble practice. The only lights allowed were the marshaling wands.

Anyway, call came to scramble, jockeys strapped in, fires lit, doors open, ready to go.

So I ran outside with the wands, signaled brakes off and furiously waved the wands to signal a fast exit. Engines screamed and the ground shook, but the fecking bird stayed still. So I again signaled BRAKES OFF, jockeys get a bit excited on a scramble. Again engines screamed and the thunder god was in attendance, but still no movement. In despair I connected the intercom to the plane and asked disparagingly

" Have you released the brakes. sir?"

" Yes, but you've left the fecking chocks in.... corporal! "

By now the chocks were firmly wedged in and needed a sledge hammer to get them out and a very embarrassed Gibbon had a lot of explaining to do!

[d000hg]

I was down to the last two for a permie gig, after his interview the other candidate walked straight into a glass door and knocked himself out cold, I got the job.

And they got the £10k H&S settlement?

[shaunbhoy]

I noticed two nice looking French ladies camped next to us, an enchanté exchanged and a flirty look the French women have, which means 1,000,000 things, including you disgust me (nailed-on!),

Oh well.....more washing for the missus eh?

[xoggoth]

A a fresh-faced young permie, just started a new job, my boss and I went to a client site.

Reminds me of a time a copuple of us were visiting a client and he was standing right in front of the lift to greet us. We started saying hello and shaking hands and the lift doors closed and we went back down.

[ELBBUBKUNPS]

1. Some guy walked out in front of my car when I was youth, was mouthy so gave him some verbal, 10mins later at traffic lights I see two guys approaching the car one of them the guy I gave verbal to, locked door thinking I was going to get a kicking then they waved there Police CID badges at me the guy was on duty under cover cop.

2. Spent 15mins getting a screen protector on my phone, thought it looked great couldnt see it even on it, 20mins later realised it wasnt actually on the phone I had pulled it off when I pulled the second backing off.

3. Let my girlfriend move in.

[EternalOptimist]

Pulled up at a roadhouse in the outback, checked in and asked the young blonde where the nearest bar was. 2km down the road.
So we unpacked, boots on and headed out for a nice 30 minute stretch, then a shed load of beer.
After 30 seconds the missus points at this corrugated shack, with loud carousing noises and says 'theres the bar'

'fck that sh1t 'ole' says I. 'I'd rather walk for 30 minutes and find a decent place'


So by the time I had walked halfway across the great sandy desert with me tongue dragging behind me, and the missus pecking me head, I had to turn back and admit that the receptionist may have got her kms confused with her metres.

[Old Hack]

Oh well.....more washing for the missus eh?

Fat boy, have you been drinking with your second lunch again?

Stop being a stereotype now will you, and start planning 2sies, the bus to the canteen should arrive in time...

[Moose423956]

Too many to mention. A particularly costly one involved driving into an underground car park on a bright sunny day. Thought, should I take my sunglasses off? Nah, it'll be fine. Proceeded to drive into a wall and do several hundred pounds worth of damage. To the car, not the wall.