Im lucky to be alive. probbly

[SimonMac]

The missus was made up yesterday. she saved three quid in tescos
she said 'I got you two twelve packs of fozzies for a tenner each, but then I saw a 24 pack for 17 quid'

great. stick the box in the fridge woman.

Last night I noticed one of the cans had white stuff all over the top, so we washed it off and put it to one side.

I spent most of this afternoon on the bog, I could have sh!t through the eye of a needle.

So I just went to get a can and I noticed a green mark on me knuckle, like dye almost. So I hoiks the box out of the fridge and there is a quarter of an inch of fungus growing along the inside top of the box



luckily the missus is a top nurse in the Florence Nightingale league, so she comforted me with
'stop whingeing and pour me a southern comfort'

Your married EO? I thought you were always hanging round MP like a dog on heat

[EternalOptimist]

Your married EO?

You're

[NotAllThere]

No. You are definitely our married EO. There is no escape.

[BrilloPad]

I remember my elder son at Harry Ramsdens, when he was 5, picking up chicken from the floor and eating it. My wife said "dont do that - there might be poo on the flooor". He said "then they should put up a sign saying no pooing on the floor".

[BrilloPad]

No. You are definitely our married EO. There is no escape.

But his wife is trying to blame him by putting penicillin around beer tins then blaming the shop.