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Previously on "Im lucky to be alive. probbly"

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  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post
    No. You are definitely our married EO. There is no escape.
    But his wife is trying to blame him by putting penicillin around beer tins then blaming the shop.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by zeitghost
    I remember my elder son at Harry Ramsdens, when he was 5, picking up chicken from the floor and eating it. My wife said "dont do that - there might be poo on the flooor". He said "then they should put up a sign saying no pooing on the floor".

    Leave a comment:


  • NotAllThere
    replied
    No. You are definitely our married EO. There is no escape.

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by SimonMac View Post
    Your married EO?
    You're

    Leave a comment:


  • SimonMac
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    The missus was made up yesterday. she saved three quid in tescos
    she said 'I got you two twelve packs of fozzies for a tenner each, but then I saw a 24 pack for 17 quid'

    great. stick the box in the fridge woman.

    Last night I noticed one of the cans had white stuff all over the top, so we washed it off and put it to one side.

    I spent most of this afternoon on the bog, I could have sh!t through the eye of a needle.

    So I just went to get a can and I noticed a green mark on me knuckle, like dye almost. So I hoiks the box out of the fridge and there is a quarter of an inch of fungus growing along the inside top of the box



    luckily the missus is a top nurse in the Florence Nightingale league, so she comforted me with
    'stop whingeing and pour me a southern comfort'



    Your married EO? I thought you were always hanging round MP like a dog on heat

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Here is someone who might want a photo of them :-

    Rotten food landscapes by Heikki Leis - Telegraph

    Leave a comment:


  • BigTime
    replied
    Contact the ambulance chasers now:

    BBC News - KFC must pay $8.3m to poisoned girl in Australia

    Leave a comment:


  • FiveTimes
    replied
    Sounds like you had a lucky escape.

    I would consider moving onto Carling and giving the fossies a miss from now on

    Leave a comment:


  • d000hg
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    Last night I noticed one of the cans had white stuff all over the top, so we washed it off and put it to one side.

    I spent most of this afternoon on the bog, I could have sh!t through the eye of a needle.

    So I just went to get a can and I noticed a green mark on me knuckle, like dye almost. So I hoiks the box out of the fridge and there is a quarter of an inch of fungus growing along the inside top of the box
    Originally posted by Wikipedia
    one day his father drank a "bad" can of beer (according to the boy, there was a gray sludge substance that most likely contained some sort of mutagen) and since has been slowly transforming into an inhuman blob
    Gray Matter by Stephen King - Wikipedia

    Leave a comment:


  • Lockhouse
    replied
    That's right put me off my croissant!

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by SupremeSpod View Post
    Yeah but nothing can beat having a good crap.
    colonic irrigation.....

    Leave a comment:


  • SupremeSpod
    replied
    Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
    You dont need a nurse - you need a lawyer!

    where there is blame there is a claim.

    For a start, while on the boig you could not post on cuk so that must be worth thousands in compensation for lost pleasure.
    Yeah but nothing can beat having a good crap.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    You dont need a nurse - you need a lawyer!

    where there is blame there is a claim.

    For a start, while on the boig you could not post on cuk so that must be worth thousands in compensation for lost pleasure.

    Leave a comment:


  • SupremeSpod
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    The missus was made up yesterday. she saved three quid in tescos
    she said 'I got you two twelve packs of fozzies for a tenner each, but then I saw a 24 pack for 17 quid'

    great. stick the box in the fridge woman.

    Last night I noticed one of the cans had white stuff all over the top, so we washed it off and put it to one side.

    I spent most of this afternoon on the bog, I could have sh!t through the eye of a needle.

    So I just went to get a can and I noticed a green mark on me knuckle, like dye almost. So I hoiks the box out of the fridge and there is a quarter of an inch of fungus growing along the inside top of the box



    luckily the missus is a top nurse in the Florence Nightingale league, so she comforted me with
    'stop whingeing and pour me a southern comfort'



    Get her back to Tesco for a fresh lot of Fosters, you need fluids!

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    started a topic Im lucky to be alive. probbly

    Im lucky to be alive. probbly

    The missus was made up yesterday. she saved three quid in tescos
    she said 'I got you two twelve packs of fozzies for a tenner each, but then I saw a 24 pack for 17 quid'

    great. stick the box in the fridge woman.

    Last night I noticed one of the cans had white stuff all over the top, so we washed it off and put it to one side.

    I spent most of this afternoon on the bog, I could have sh!t through the eye of a needle.

    So I just went to get a can and I noticed a green mark on me knuckle, like dye almost. So I hoiks the box out of the fridge and there is a quarter of an inch of fungus growing along the inside top of the box



    luckily the missus is a top nurse in the Florence Nightingale league, so she comforted me with
    'stop whingeing and pour me a southern comfort'



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