Can I be sacked for having nookie with a permie?

[SimonMac]

Nookie with a permie is tax deductible and IR35 proof despite what NLUK says.

Charitable donation?

[vetran]

Surely the silver bullet would be substitution?

Take her from behind but stop half way and make sure someone else does part of the work? Maybe its an opportunity for someone here? Anyone offering secondary penetration tests?

To avoid D&C - When she says 'Ride me faster big boy' slow down.

Seriously
Seen it in a permie role, senior manager (married) was servicing the Company Secretary (married). He was let go.

However that company spent a lot of time in court both on HR and contract breach cases.

[amcdonald]

Churchy has made false rape allegations before so be gentle with him

But it's only rape the first time!

[TestMangler]

Place I worked before, the client manager for the parent company was doing the secretary of the IT director of the subsidiary co. IT director could never work out why everyone knew of his decisions and ideas before he told anyone.

I was 'friends' with a permmie o the same contract and no one was bothered, except her hubby, who was a developer. Used to love failing his code in testing and secretly thinking 'i've had your wife' at meetings

[MarillionFan]

At a greenfield clientco many many years ago which consisted of setting up a very new call centre and hiring mostly pretty young ladies(I was young at the time as well). One of my colleagues who was setting up the telephony system(and who was a smooth devil) would prowl the call centre for a prospective shag. Once identified he would tell them that he was trying out some new software/upgrades, that sort of crap and that he needed her to tell him about anything different/slow/quirky etc.

He was a smooth good looking bastard, very well turned out and a little posh & I am afraid a number fell for his charm in this way and the offer of a 'would you like to come up with me in the plane(he was having lessons). That hotel bedpost became quite notched. I on the other hand got stuck with one girl who eventually convinced herself she was the reincarnation of Princess Diana. I do pick 'em.

[mudskipper]

Worked for the MOD many years ago. At the end of the day, two people would have to stay late to do the security check. Used to engineer the rota so I would end up on the same day as a cute bloke in the comms group. Many a snog and grope behind the filing cabinets ensued.

Reader, I married him.

[eek]

Reader, I married him.

Don't you think a Jane Eyre reference will be well above the head of the average cretin on this site.

The Mr Men books are about the average reading level on here and I know MF still struggles with the longer words in Mr Tickle (such as tickle).

[Old Greg]

Worked for the Ministry of War many years ago. At the end of the day, two people would have to stay late to do the air raid precautions. Used to engineer the rota so I would end up on the same day as a cute bloke in the comms group. Many a snog and grope behind the filing cabinets ensued.

Reader, I married him.

FTFY

[hyperD]

He was a smooth good looking bastard, very well turned out and a little posh & I am afraid a number fell for his charm in this way and the offer of a 'would you like to come up with me in the plane...

Er...hmmm, <cough>, does work, by the way

Got my ex-wife by that route, lost my fortunes, inevitably, but if anyone knows any millionaire octogenarians, I'm all ears (or any other body parts, including incontipants, that would help)...

[nomadd]

Don't you think a Jane Eyre reference will be well above the head of the average cretin on this site.

You do realise that he'd only picked it up from The Simpsons.