Boarding school - good idea or bad idea?

[IR35 Avoider]

I went at age 12, 13 weeks at a time away from home. I didn't like it. It was a bit like living in "Lord of the Flies" for three terms a year for several years. (Except that in "Lord of the flies" the boys were at least a similar age/size to each other.)

As a parent, why would you assume you will have any idea what happens there? Do you not think that people who have complete physical power over them for 24 hours of every day for months at a time might have some influence over what your children tell you?

I've always regarded myself as having left home at 12. My parents were just people I had to get along with in the holidays, before I returned to a real life I didn't like.

[Mich the Tester]

I went at age 12, 13 weeks at a time away from home. I didn't like it. It was a bit like living in "Lord of the Flies" for three terms a year for several years. (Except that in "Lord of the flies" the boys were at least a similar age/size to each other.)

As a parent, why would you assume you will have any idea what happens there? Do you not think that people who have complete physical power over them for 24 hours of every day for months at a time might have some influence over what your children tell you?

I've always regarded myself as having left home at 12. My parents were just people I had to get along with in the holidays, before I returned to a real life I didn't like.

Yep, I first went at 9 and hated it; I recognise exactly what you're saying. One thing I resent is being forced to grow up too young. If you cried about being homesick you were told to 'grow up' and take it like a man. For bleeding hell's sake, what kind of moron tells a 9 year old to 'grow up and take it like a man'? I mean a 9 year old FFS. Isn't the point of being a child that you can get on with being a child? There are still plenty of things I haven't told my parents and I wouldn't want to tell them; I'd rather they grow old happy. I don't blame them; as I see it they were victims of a system that exists on lies, false social pressure and a huge marketing machine that sucks people in and keeps them in.

Every person I see defending the system gives the same old tired arguments, cites so many examples of such happy succesful people, cites the same tulipe about 'well rounded individuals' and so on, but ignores the fact that most succesful, happy adults didn't go to boarding school and didn't need it to become 'well rounded individuals'.

[MarillionFan]

Yeah, so how did this 'going off girls' thing happen to her then?

by the way, are you sure about that?

WHS. They never grow out of it if introduced at an early age.

Mich still goes cottaging looking for prefects from the local school.

[Mich the Tester]

I'll go a step further and challenge people on this now. Now you've read the stories, not just mine, but some of the others; maybe my school was an extreme case, but if you've read what some of the posters who did go to boarding school have said and you're still prepared to pay tens of thousands of pounds to let someone else take your children away and give them their idea of an upbringing then I can't help thinking you're a sad, deluded loser who should never have had children in the first place; maybe a sex starved bisexual 18 year old bullying prefect can actually do a better job than yourself. If only you'd used contraception you could have prevented a great deal of human suffering.

OK, maybe the horror stories are those of a minority, but it's a bigger minority than you think; do you want your kids to become a part of that minority? Well? Do you think sex abuse at boarding schools is peculiar to Irish catholic schools? Do you think children tell their parents everything that happens to them? If so then perhaps you're too naïve to have kids.

You chose to have kids; now give them an upbringing. At home. And don't give us weak excuses like 'oooh but my career, you know I can get that great job abroad but they'll have to start boarding'; what's it to be? Bring up your kids and let them be kids or have your bloody holy career?

I'll make an exception if your kids are disabled and they can get proper schooling in a caring environment in a boarding school for disabled kids, but I'd still say you should be very careful and listen to your kids very carefully.

[MarillionFan]

some rant .

Oh man up!

[Mich the Tester]

Oh man up!

Please read my last post in tpd2 for further information.

[Arturo Bassick]

I'll go a step <snip>

You are assuming that bullying of that nature never goes on outside boarding schools. Let me assure you that it does.

[Mich the Tester]

You are assuming that bullying of that nature never goes on outside boarding schools. Let me assure you that it does.

No I am not. Bullying goes on all over the place; the difference is that most kids can escape by going home in the evenings.

[Arturo Bassick]

most kids can escape by going home in the evenings.

Oh no they cant. For many it carries on, or even gets worse when they get home. Often they live in the same area as their tormentors.

[d000hg]

No I am not. Bullying goes on all over the place; the difference is that most kids can escape by going home in the evenings.

Oh no they cant. For many it carries on, or even gets worse when they get home. Often they live in the same area as their tormentors.

Indeed, for many home is the problem area. However, the demographic where that's commonplace is NOT the demographic who send kids to boarding school.