Boarding school - good idea or bad idea?

[Mich the Tester]

Oh no they cant. For many it carries on, or even gets worse when they get home. Often they live in the same area as their tormentors.

Yes, and boarding school kids often live in the same room as their tormentors.

Now I'm not denying there's a problem with bullying in day schools; there is, in fact it's a massive social problem and it's not just among kids; adults bully each other too. The thing is, the thread was about boarding schools and not about day schools or workplaces. It makes me very angry; I hate bullying in all forms and I do my best to tackle it in various different ways.

Believe me, I know something about this stuff as I dealt with a lot kids who've been bullied as part of a project set up among sports clubs to help them. I have a good friend who has set up voluntary organisations all over the world to help bullied children and I'm helping him to raise money through sport right now. It's an issue that's very close to my heart.

[MarillionFan]

So Mich. Why did your parents send you to boarding school?

I know of a lot of forces parents that do, but otherwise?

[Mich the Tester]

So Mich. Why did your parents send you to boarding school?

I know of a lot of forces parents that do, but otherwise?

Social pressure, career abroad, misplaced fear that a reasonably intelligent kid can't adapt to a different education system every few years, that kind of thing; pretty standard really. Plus an incredibly effective marketing machine that plays on people's fears very cleverly. Especially that very English middle class fear that one's kids might turn out to be something other than 'middle class'.

[realityhack]

I say we judge the OP question by looking at the members of the congregation that boarded

Mich
Owlhoot

are there any more ?

yup. from age 12 to 16. it was both horrible and brilliant.

From 14 for me - WDS23S.

I enjoyed being away from home, but could see that the youngsters had a terrible time of it sometimes. Our school had boarding from the age of 4!! This was clearly very upsetting for some of them.

As a prefect towards the end of my time there, there were times where I'd find myself effectively in loco parentis for young kids whose parents had dumped them there and flown off to a fancy job in the Far East or some such - who would pick them up when they were 18. The older kids who'd gone through this were very streetwise and jaded - I can't help feeling they lost something of their childhood, despite what they gained in confidence & resilience.

I enjoyed boarding school and can clearly see the benefits, but I'd never send very young children to one. Yes there was bullying and some *extreme* examples of cruelty - but generally it kept itself in check in a "Lord of the Flies" sort of way. A lot of it depends on the attitude and approach of the housemaster and matron - who can cultivate a positive environment, or make it hell on earth.

[Mich the Tester]

From 14 for me - WDS23S.

I enjoyed being away from home, but could see that the youngsters had a terrible time of it sometimes. Our school had boarding from the age of 4!! This was clearly very upsetting for some of them.

As a prefect towards the end of my time there, there were times where I'd find myself effectively in loco parentis for young kids whose parents had dumped them there and flown off to a fancy job in the Far East or some such - who would pick them up when they were 18. The older kids who'd gone through this were very streetwise and jaded - I can't help feeling they lost something of their childhood, despite what they gained in confidence & resilience.

I enjoyed boarding school and can clearly see the benefits, but I'd never send very young children to one. Yes there was bullying and some *extreme* examples of cruelty - but generally it kept itself in check in a "Lord of the Flies" sort of way. A lot of it depends on the attitude and approach of the housemaster and matron - who can cultivate a positive environment, or make it hell on earth.

...or be completely absent and leave day to day running of the show to their favourite chosen prefects while sitting in their study drinking themselves into oblivion, possibly to forget their own memories.

[Mich the Tester]

From 14 for me - WDS23S.

I enjoyed being away from home, but could see that the youngsters had a terrible time of it sometimes. Our school had boarding from the age of 4!! This was clearly very upsetting for some of them.

4 year olds? Why in heaven's name did their parents have children?

[mudskipper]

My son's (state) school has a small number of boarders - about 12 in each year group I think. He thinks they're happy and says they seem to have a great time. Maybe with small numbers, and not being public school (although it does have pretensions!) it's more of a family atmosphere. Or maybe he's wrong and they're actually dead miserable!

[realityhack]

...or be completely absent and leave day to day running of the show to their favourite chosen prefects while sitting in their study drinking themselves into oblivion, possibly to forget their own memories.

I joined the school just at a time of transition from one set of housemasters that were unquestionably downright evil mother****ers, to a properly nice crew - the difference it made was incredible. There were a few 'characters' who tried to continue the old ways, but it generally settled down really well.

[Mich the Tester]

I joined the school just at a time of transition from one set of housemasters that were unquestionably downright evil mother****ers, to a properly nice crew - the difference it made was incredible. There were a few 'characters' who tried to continue the old ways, but it generally settled down really well.

To be fair I saw that transition at prep school too and it was certainly a positive change; didn't really make up for the year of hell with the first lot though and didn't compensate for being homesick. Public school was where it all went pear shaped, largely due to prefects who'd been brought up in a brutal environment where 18 year olds bullying 13 and 14 year olds was seen as the way things should be, and housemasters and a headmaster who were completely negligent in any duties other than holding the standard sales speeches at sports day and schmoozing around with members of the aristocracy.

[MarillionFan]

My son's (state) school has a small number of borders - about 12 in each year group I think. He thinks they're happy and says they seem to have a great time. Maybe with small numbers, and not being public school (although it does have pretensions!) it's more of a family atmosphere. Or maybe he's wrong and they're actually dead miserable!

Is your son a puppy?