Bloody client keeps dropping me in the deep end.

[PAH]

What's the worse situation that someone has found themselve dropped into unprepared?

In my first contract I did a spot of data conversion and was visiting various clients in preparation for them being converted to the new system.

Turned up at one client to find they were orthodox jews and it was time for them to pray, which involved closing the office.

One of them motioned for me to join them (I'm not jewish so have no idea what the protocol was), saw the stunned look on my face (started laughing so I know he was winding me up) and said there's a cafe down the road where I can wait and he'll come and get me when they're finished.

Was quite a relief. I was preparing myself to sing some Neil Diamond as I'm sure that's what they do, a bit of Jazz Singer karaoke.

[ChimpMaster]

He doesnt have a fricking office. He spends all his time jetting between offices/countries. Frick knows where he is. Haven't spoken to him for a month. I just get emails.

Do you work for Batman?

[suityou01]

Got invited to a 4 hour meeting a couple of days ago to discuss a BI reporting solution for a client of clientco.

For the two days I have been unable to get hold of the director on my side who had given my name so I was unable to prepare or even know the context.

I turn up at the client site as agreed and lo and fricking behold I am the only representitive of 'clientco'. In addition there was also another guy from a competitor.

The client then spent an hour outlining his requirements then turned to me, told me that the BI Director had already given him the background on the solution(what fricking background) and could I now start to run through the steps/processes/project plan. Kimball to the rescue!

I'm used to being dropped in it but this is getting ridiculous. A few months ago I dialled into a conference call I had been invited to an hour earlier, had the webex turned over to me and asked me to start(!!!!!!!!). I didn't even know what the bloody call was about let alone that I was presenting it.

What's the worse situation that someone has found themselve dropped into unprepared?

<clenches hands together - blows into them - rubs them together with glee>
<cracks knuckles>



A real contractor would know what to do. A real man would know what to do. Heck even I would know what to do.

Baffle them with bulltulip until someone grabs an end and starts dropping in some context. It's a BI reporting solution FFS not rocket science.

Start by asking them to define the roles, then reports by role, then frequency - any automation of the reports?

Get the ball rolling and let them do the defining. You listen and ask questions.

Got it?

Invoice in the post.

He he he what a frakin bedwetter.

[MarillionFan]

<clenches hands together - blows into them - rubs them together with glee>
<cracks knuckles>

Follow Kimball methodology

ftfy

Do keep up numbnuts. The thread is about being dropped into situations you're not briefed about, not about not knowing what to do.

I know exactly what to do. I don't need to bulltulip as you say above, as I know it all.

You really do need to listen more, maybe that way you wouldn't make all those mistakes you keep telling us about.

[psychocandy]

I had a mate turn up on a customer site (no it wasnt me) only to find out that this particular customer was in the middle of a huge legal argument with mates employer.

Employer had sent him (without his knowledge) as a last resort to appease them to avoid court action. So he turned up not knowing this, customer demanded all sorts was fixed/installed etc (which he wasnt equipped for). Of course, he had to admit he couldnt do this.

Customer locked his car in car park, locked the door to the building, and told him he wasnt going anywhere till it was sorted. In the end, he had to call the police to come and tell this customer to pack it in.

[suityou01]

ftfy

Do keep up numbnuts. The thread is about being dropped into situations you're not briefed about, not about not knowing what to do.

I know exactly what to do.

You really do need to listen more, maybe that way you wouldn't make all those mistakes you keep telling us about.

I read perfectly well what you wrote you wet lettuce. I get dumped into situations like this all the time. It's part of contracting.

You said a while back you were thinking of going back permie? Perhaps you're just not cut out for this contracting lark.

:shake-head:

[MarillionFan]

I read perfectly well what you wrote you wet lettuce. I get dumped into situations like this all the time. It's part of contracting.

You said a while back you were thinking of going back permie? Perhaps you're just not cut out for this contracting lark.

:shake-head:

Contracting is to easy. Permie offers more scope for complexity because of the added politics.

[suityou01]

Contracting is to easy. Permie offers more scope for complexity because of the added politics.

Plenty of politics in contracting even though we would not like to admit it. Stop changing the topic, this is my day!

Now where were we, oh yes you were wringing out your sheets.

Now man up and hunt this director down.

[Zippy]

The "schoolboy error" here is accepting an invitation to a meeting. I won't go to a meeting unless somebody gives me a very good reason why I should.

[suityou01]

The "schoolboy error" here is accepting an invitation to a meeting. I won't go to a meeting unless somebody gives me a very good reason why I should.

Quite right. He's far too soft a touch.