Liz Jones - Sperm Thief

[MaryPoppins]

Link blocked by my client. What's the story?

Clinically insane journo writes a 'confession' around deciding to try to 'steal' her partners sperm, having suddenly decided she did want children - despite telling him she didn't. Attempts to 'steal' sperm from condom after intercourse, and presumably forms some plan around stuffing it up herself. Seems surprised at the lack of instant bun in oven.

Tries the same trick with husband, fail. They divorce.

Warnings scattered throughout article to men, about women in their 30's and 40's in general.

[TheFaQQer]

Link blocked by my client. What's the story?

Loony tune columnist says

- she told her bloke she didn't want children. He didn't trust she was on the pill, so always used a condom. She tried to get pregnant by taking the sperm from the condom. "I thought it was my right, given that he was living with me and I had bought him many, many M&S ready meals."

- That didn't work (strangely enough)

- She tried it again and again and again, despite her husband not wanting children

"I do believe that any man who moves in with a woman in her late 30s or early 40s should take it as read that she will want to use them to procreate, by fair means or foul, no matter how much she protests otherwise."

"A 2001 survey revealed that 42 per cent of women would lie about using contraception in order to get pregnant in spite of their partners’ wishes."

- her friends do the same - Among my circle, many girlfriends have told me how they have tricked their boyfriend or fiancé or husband. One found herself childless in her 40s, so she lied to a very new boyfriend that she was on the Pill. He is now in a new relationship having to pay support for a child he never sees.

- One tells me she used secret hormone injections to make herself more fertile; another uses a clandestine ovulating chart kept in the tea towel drawer (a place she knows her husband never looks in).

- She said: ‘I really want a year off work. I might even go part-time after that, maybe two days a week. He will just have to work harder.’

[MaryPoppins]

TFQ provides a much better summary.

[TheFaQQer]

Best rated comment on the Mail site:

This woman is an absolute idiot. Period.

- Sandra, Aus, 3/11/2011 3:53
Rating +2195

Worst rated:

Just look around at all of the (male) celebrities now paying child support for children conceived in a fling (Hugh Grant, Jude Law, Justin Bieber, Tom Brady, François-Henri Pinault) to know they weren't paying attention. Great article Liz.

- simply_put, Las Vegas, NV, 3/11/2011 4:32
Rating -386

[Pondlife]

Best rated comment on the Mail site:

snip

Worst rated:

I think we have the making of a new CUK competition here. Who can get the most ratings for a post on an agreed Mail, HYS, Guardian article.

Posts that get removed by mods are disqualified. Both + and - count towards your total.

[MaryPoppins]

Best rated comment on the Mail site:



Worst rated:

I saw that one about the men 'not paying attention'.

I might write an article about all the men who are more than keen to share their spunk about the place to be 'stolen'!

[EternalOptimist]

I saw that one about the men 'not paying attention'.

I might write an article about all the men who are more than keen to share their spunk about the place to be 'stolen'!

my first missus once told me she had put a small prick in my condom


which was a bit of a coincidence really

[Doggy Styles]

TFQ provides a much better summary.

Many thanks to both of you, now I can enjoy the thread.

[OwlHoot]

.. my rapidly dwindling egg supply. ..

She sounds like a farmer whose hens are on strike

(right now to carry on reading the article ..)

[Churchill]

This bit made I larf:



That tends to mean that making babies is more than averagely difficult.

Though I suppose she could have collected his used tissues after a good old pot noodle.

She should try wringing the curtains out!