The 32 Wittiest Comebacks Of All Time

[TheFaQQer]

For me it has to be the cricket sledge

Healy to Ranatunga: "Why are you so fat?"
Ranatunga in Reply: : "Because everytime i f**k your mum she gives me a cookie"

That was allegedly McGrath / Brandes - although both have denied it ever took place, and there is no record of any altercation between the two occurring.

Ranatunga / Healy was when he asked for a runner - "you don't get a runner for being an overweight unfit fat c**t"

[Mich the Tester]

Not a sledging response, but good nonetheless;

Fran Cotton captained the North of England to a legendary win against the All Blacks in 1979. As the All Blacks performed their Haka, Cotton walked behind the Northern players, one of whom, Steve Smith told him 'I'm tulip scared Fran' which prompted Cotton to shout 'look at the big poofs dancing'. Smith said said 'Frannie, keep your voice down - they might hear you', to which he responded ' I bloody well hope so'.

Legendary guy, and possibly the hardest bastard ever to play the game.

[Churchill]

Not a sledging response, but good nonetheless;

Fran Cotton captained the North of England to a legendary win against the All Blacks in 1979. As the All Blacks performed their Haka, Cotton walked behind the Northern players, one of whom, Steve Smith told him 'I'm tulip scared Fran' which prompted Cotton to shout 'look at the big poofs dancing'. Smith said said 'Frannie, keep your voice down - they might hear you', to which he responded ' I bloody well hope so'.

Legendary guy, and possibly the hardest bastard ever to play the game.

It's always the swamp monster pic!

[Mich the Tester]

It's always the swamp monster pic!

It's the best pic; don't think anyone really needs to see the bloke's face. His face looks like a JCB.

[wobbegong]

Not strictly a 'comeback' . . .

In a letter;

Dear Sir,

**** you.

Yours etc.

P.S. Strong letter to follow.


- author unknown

[russell]

The cricket ones are garbage I hear better down the pub every week. Look for some of my posts for world class comebacks that is some cases caused psychological issues for the recipient.

[TheFaQQer]

Arkell's lawyers wrote a letter which concluded: "His attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of your reply." The magazine's response was, in full: "We acknowledge your letter of 29th April referring to Mr J. Arkell. We note that Mr Arkell's attitude to damages will be governed by the nature of our reply and would therefore be grateful if you would inform us what his attitude to damages would be, were he to learn that the nature of our reply is as follows: **** off."

[d000hg]

The cricket ones are garbage I hear better down the pub every week. Look for some of my posts for world class comebacks that is some cases caused psychological issues for the recipient.

I thought you were banned/gone, when did you return? You just missed a chap called Chaffinch, shame asI think the two of you would have got on well. Zoiderman too, not sure if he left also.

[russell]

I thought you were banned/gone, when did you return? You just missed a chap called Chaffinch, shame asI think the two of you would have got on well. Zoiderman too, not sure if he left also.

Not banned (yet ) but left for a while. Will look up their posts.

[Arturo Bassick]

Favourite cricket is:

Douglas Jardine (England) and Bill Woodfull (Australia)

England player Jardine complained that one of the Australian players called him a bastard. Australian captain Bill Woodfull turns to his team, points to Jardine and asked “Which one of you bastards called this bastard a bastard?”