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Neighbours golden retriever

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    #31
    If you're really pissed off you could always snap one off on his doorstep yourself...
    "Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny. "


    Thomas Jefferson

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      #32
      I've been thinking about this and have come to the conclusion that you need a Rottweiler EO.
      1) Turds are much bigger,so do pop round to the neighbours lawn
      2) If said retriever ever sets a paw in your garden again it'll be toast.
      +50 Xeno Geek Points
      Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
      As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

      Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

      CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

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        #33
        Nah, Rotties are soppy.
        You need a Jack Russell - they don't take no sh*t from no one!

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          #34
          Originally posted by ctdctd View Post
          Nah, Rotties are soppy.
          You need a Jack Russell - they don't take no sh*t from no one!
          Nice pun.

          My brother's Jack Russell's mother emasculated an Alsation.
          My all-time favourite Dilbert cartoon, this is: BTW, a Dumpster is a brand of skip, I think.

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            #35
            Originally posted by Ruprect View Post
            Anyway, I'm off to cr ap on my neighbour's doorstep

            ;-)
            Are you available for hire? You might have a viable Plan B there.

            What do you think, EO? Would you use a Rent-a-Poop service? I see the terms Rent-a-Poop/tulip/Turd are rare on Google, so it might be a winner.

            "Hire one of our Grumpy Old Gits. They'll shamble along, tulip on your neighbour's lawn, them shamble off again, muttering to themselves. They are immune to being shouted at (they're as deaf as posts) and anyone abusing them will find themselves beaten with a walking stick until the neighbours call the Police." One lawn turd for just £25.

            Summer special offer: 3 Little Old Ladies discussing prolapses, diverticulitis, weeping leg ulcers and unsuccessful haemorrhoid treatment in very loud voices outside an open window for 90 minutes for just £100. With a free "Excuse me dear, is this the stop for the number 19?" whilst wetting herself like a horse on your target victim's doorstop, FREE!"
            My all-time favourite Dilbert cartoon, this is: BTW, a Dumpster is a brand of skip, I think.

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              #36
              Originally posted by Ruprect View Post
              Father in law or dog?
              No, the elephant.
              Behold the warranty -- the bold print giveth and the fine print taketh away.

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                #37
                Originally posted by xoggoth View Post
                Damn dogs. Next door's got into our garden a couple of times last year and damaged my collection of skulls round the pond..
                Skulldoggery!
                Behold the warranty -- the bold print giveth and the fine print taketh away.

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                  #38
                  Originally posted by Sysman View Post
                  Skulldoggery!
                  Me, me, me...

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                    #39
                    Renta-poop and Skulldoggery

                    Sounds like a children's TV programme.
                    "Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch." - Orson Welles

                    Norrahe's blog

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                      #40
                      Originally posted by ctdctd View Post
                      Nah, Rotties are soppy.
                      You need a Jack Russell - they don't take no sh*t from no one!
                      I had a cat (Bertie) who stood up to an annoying Jack Russell. The dog was obviously not used to animals standing up to him and fighting back. Bertie did not run away when the dog tried to chase him.
                      He just sat there, then hissed at the dog and swiped his nose with his claws, Jack Russel turned tail and ran off yelping. Hilarious

                      Bertie lived a long and happy life and died a few years ago. I'm not sure about the doggie
                      I'm sorry, but I'll make no apologies for this

                      Pogle is awarded +5 Xeno Geek Points.
                      CUK University Challenge Champions 2010
                      CUK University Challenge Champions 2012

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