Modem fault prevents me getting coffee

[DaveB]

Two things strike me about this.

1. What a cack-handed way to run a coffee machine, the bank transaction charges probably cost more than the coffee.

2. How hard would it be to surreptitiously whack a little bit of custom hardware in the line to return the appropriate approval. I'm sure there is a lizard around here somewhere who could help.

3. Whats the betting that the coffee machine is not in fact running 3DES or some similarly strong encryption routines meaning that the bit of kit from 2. could also be used to harvest card details.

Ok that's three, but the third one came to me as I was writing number two.

[xoggoth]

How long before Al Quaida hacks into the factory computers that program the firmware of machines like this? How long before somebody gets attacked by a dishwasher?

[DaveB]

How long before Al Quaida hacks into the factory computers that program the firmware of machines like this? How long before somebody gets attacked by a dishwasher?

It's already happening

[xoggoth]

On 1 channel it still shows the storage tank that belongs to the brickworks at the bottom of the road but ok on another.

PS IIt is in the shed looking out of the window, why would I want to sit looking at my shed?

PPS Oh alright, it's a fair cop. I just love staring at my collection of old screws and washing machine bits in the shed.

[mudskipper]

In the old days, when using a public lavatory, you'd go in, do your stuff, operate a lever to flush, operate a tap and soap dispenser to wash your hands, then press a button to dry your hands.

There's some shiny new stainless steel auto-loos in Reading. Must have hit car park rush hour, because there was a fair old queue. Lit up buttons on the outside indicating occupancy status, including a flashing light for 'cleaning' when lots of swishing watery noises come from the space within.

Waited my turn, went in, did my stuff, following which the loo flushed itself. Waved my hands in the sink thing and soap and water were dispensed. Was just waiting for the hot air when the bloody thing went into cleaning mode - jets of water squirting across the floor and down the walls. Emerged rather wet and cursing like a navvy to much merriment from the waiting queue. Apparently I had failed to engage the lock correctly, so, having found itself unused for 3 minutes, it had decided to have a quick sluice down. You'd think, that the sensors to operate the flush and sink might have given it a clue that someone was in there, but I guess the use cases didn't cover failure to lock the door properly.

[xoggoth]

It must have been much better in the old days when you could just employ some ghastly common person to do your crapping for you. Damn socialism has a lot to answer for.

[Zippy]

Poor k2p2

[Wodewick]

Poor k2p2

ROFPML x 10

<cough> Errr Yeah poor k2p2 <splutter.... snort.... tears streaming down face>

[d000hg]

Nice counterpart to the infamous Trojan coffee pot story.
Also very lucid writing for someone with no coffee, or was that written after you obtained a replacement?

It's also pretty reminiscent of Stallman, though it appears in your case nobody had the nous to hack the machine for free coffee

[RichardCranium]

Oh dear, what can the matter be?
k2p2's flushed down the lavatory.
Paid to pee not assault & battery,
The sensor didn't know she was there.

Went in, unlocked, sat down too hastily:
Reading council's upgraded them latterly
I do hope it wasn't too splattery!
Shame that the queue didn't care.

Next time, k2p2 wants to do a pee,
Or do number twos and sit quiet for minutes three:
Number one, lock the damn door behind thee...
Or take towels and go in bare!