First Date. Terrible. Sigh.

[MaryPoppins]

I have never really done "dating", that's quite sad isn't it. Ex was a friend, so it never really happened.

So, last night, I got back in the game.

Started off fine, but then he began saying how we should go back to his when the pub closes, so he can play me his guitar. Cue many elbow nudges from me, nudge nudge, wink wink. Turns out he doesn't have much of a sense of humour (strike one) and insists that he is a great guitar player and would love to play for me. I squirm uncomfortably as I realise he's serious.

A couple of drinks later, I'm wobbling around putting my coat on and everything has a rosy glow - of course I will go back to his to listen to him play the guitar; perhaps I even fancy him a bit more now - what the heck.

However in the taxi on the way there, I start to sober up a bit, and realise I am beginning to regret my decision.

I fully regret my decision soon enough.

He insists I sit on the sofa "come on, get comfy!" while he actually does go and get an acoustic guitar. My heart sinks as he then stands directly in front of me, one leg up on the sofa (affording me a very uncomfortable view).

He begins to play a ropey version of some Oasis song, while I squirm and wish I was at home in my jimmers. He then grabs a song book and throws it to me, still playing, and tells me to "sing along".

Lord, no. I beat a hasty retreat and only felt slightly bad this morning when I thought about how rude I'd been.

Judging by his miffed text message, I think I was in the minority of females who have not been seduced by this piffle.

Anyone else care to share bad date stories?

[suityou01]

I have never really done "dating", that's quite sad isn't it. Ex was a friend, so it never really happened.

So, last night, I got back in the game.

Started off fine, but then he began saying how we should go back to his when the pub closes, so he can play me his guitar. Cue many elbow nudges from me, nudge nudge, wink wink. Turns out he doesn't have much of a sense of humour (strike one) and insists that he is a great guitar player and would love to play for me. I squirm uncomfortably as I realise he's serious.

A couple of drinks later, I'm wobbling around putting my coat on and everything has a rosy glow - of course I will go back to his to listen to him play the guitar; perhaps I even fancy him a bit more now - what the heck.

However in the taxi on the way there, I start to sober up a bit, and realise I am beginning to regret my decision.

I fully regret my decision soon enough.

He insists I sit on the sofa "come on, get comfy!" while he actually does go and get an acoustic guitar. My heart sinks as he then stands directly in front of me, one leg up on the sofa (affording me a very uncomfortable view).

He begins to play a ropey version of some Oasis song, while I squirm and wish I was at home in my jimmers. He then grabs a song book and throws it to me, still playing, and tells me to "sing along".

Lord, no. I beat a hasty retreat and only felt slightly bad this morning when I thought about how rude I'd been.

Judging by his miffed text message, I think I was in the minority of females who have not been seduced by this piffle.

Anyone else care to share bad date stories?

I haven't laughed so much in ages. Crying. Can't breathe. Thanks so much.

[suityou01]

Dated this nutter once who drank Stella better than I could, walked into the jelly bean machine and puked on my trainers.

She's sat next to me.

[MaryPoppins]

He also pulled a bit of a face when I asked for a pint of cider in the pub, commented in slightly too much detail on my post baby figure, and described himself as "spiritual". He must have drugged me to make me decide to prolong the date.

[MaryPoppins]

Dated this nutter once who drank Stella better than I could, walked into the jelly bean machine and puked on my trainers.

She's sat next to me.

She sounds ace.

[suityou01]

She sounds ace.

Well she did grow out of it and become a mum.

[Board Game Geek]

Oh Mary, poor you !

Had me in stitches though.

At least he didn't want to show you his "organ". (Cue Arnold Rimmer).

I'm sure CyberLoon used to play the guitar you know.

I heard on the radio that the big thing in America at the moment regarding dating, is...boardgames. Seriously ! Not sure why though. Most boardgames with complete strangers tend to end in bloodbaths.

"Neville, you know that unit only had 2 action points left, and yet you've forced marched then for 3 points, which is clearly impossible within the rules mechanics of the game. I don't care if Panzer Division Clausewitz are highly mechanised and mobile, this particular hex is a bit tricky due to light swamp terrain. Besides Neville, if you knew your history, most of the tanks in that division are Panzer III's and IV's and the majority of them are in poor repair. Move them back, otherwise I shall have to pack the game away and leave you to reflect upon your poor tactical choices"

Actually, I think the games that are played are things like Twister, Operation, etc.

[suityou01]

Also, I think it was highly inappropriate for him to even think about asking you back to his place after just one date. He obviously had other things on his mind.

I'm sure MP is a big girl now.

[suityou01]

Also, with all of the nutters around these days, keep an eye on your drink at all times!

WHS

[MaryPoppins]

You should have asked him if two halves would be more acceptable to him.

Next time, just follow your gut feelings and get out sooner rather than later. I think you'll just know instinctively when the situation feels right.

Also, I think it was highly inappropriate for him to even think about asking you back to his place after just one date. He obviously had other things on his mind. Also, with all of the nutters around these days, keep an eye on your drink at all times!

My sober instinct was the right one, but the heady combination of not getting out much, wearing make up, as well as a few drinks, made me forget that.

It was fair enough of him to ask, I could have said no! I made it quite clear he would get nowhere if he tried to pluck more than his stupid guitar strings.