1 Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," Casablanca,") almost inaudibly.
2 Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias on a kazoo. If a permie complains, explain that it is for your performing arts class (or hit him/her with the wrench).
3 Collect all your urine in a small jug. Keep it on your desk.
4 Chain yourself to your colleague's chair. Get him/her to bring you food.
5 Leave your computer on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
6 Buy as many back issues of Horse and Hound as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.
7 Fake a heart attack. When your colleague gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
8 Eat glass.
9 Smoke ballpoint pens.
10 Smile. All the time.
2 Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian arias on a kazoo. If a permie complains, explain that it is for your performing arts class (or hit him/her with the wrench).
3 Collect all your urine in a small jug. Keep it on your desk.
4 Chain yourself to your colleague's chair. Get him/her to bring you food.
5 Leave your computer on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
6 Buy as many back issues of Horse and Hound as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.
7 Fake a heart attack. When your colleague gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
8 Eat glass.
9 Smoke ballpoint pens.
10 Smile. All the time.
10 ways to get out of a contract with a no-termination-clause early...
Comment