Good insult.

[cojak]

I was very drunk at a mates party and wanted to dance (..how unusual! ).

I noticed one chap standing and boogied on over to him and said "wanna dance?" and started wobbling around..

An irate woman appeared and said "you can't dance with him, he's mine" - to which I looked at her like she was mad and replied "I wanted to dance with him, not f**k him - but not that much" and wandered off..

Not a ladylike response I know but a satisfying one...

A few years later the woman came up to me at another party and admitted that the bloke had signalled her to rescue him from me, but realised later that I was harmless to him and he wasn't worth the humiliation...

[Drewster]

Not a ladylike response I know but a satisfying one...

I have always found it satisfying to get a lady to respond............

Or possibly more true unusual

Or [back on topic]:
Drewster: <Strolls over to GYL at party> Hello... Would you do me the honour of consenting to dance with me (or words to that effect)
GYL: ... and then I said... and she said.... and it was huge... and she said....
Drewster: Errrr scuse me <cough> Would you like to dance?
GYL: ... and then he said.... cop this big boy... then she said... up the back...
Drewster: Errrrrrrrrr Scu.....
GYL: Would you just F'ck off!!! I am talking!
Drewster: <Strolls back to mates trying to look cool>

[swamp]

My favourite put down is simply:

Jog on.

[wobbegong]

Some classics from school...

Your Mum's so old she farts dust....

In a similar vein; Your Mum's so old her fanny's haunted.

[Grinder]

Here's one: "man bitch"