Good insult.

[The Lone Gunman]

I could agree with what you say, but then we would both be wrong.

[Drewster]

I could agree with what you say, but then we would both be wrong.

[Jot that one down on back of hand for Client Meeting this PM]

[/Jot that one down on back of hand for Client Meeting this PM]

[DaveB]

I'm sorry, you appear to have mistaken me for someone who gives a tulip.

Your Mamma's so fat when I screw her I just slap her on the thigh and surf the wave on in there.

Your Mamma's so fat she needs two watches. One for each timezone.

Your Mamma's so fat when she comes to visit you at home, she takes up the whole backseat.

[DaveB]

Not original but this one takes the prize for sheer venomous flaming.

You are a vulgar little maggot. Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As they say in Texas, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with the instructions on the heel.

You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer on the lips than be seen with you. You are a fiend, a sniveling, spinless coward.

You have bad breath.

I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you especially your existence. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit rotohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum.

I wish you would go away.

You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a putrefaction, a big suck on a sour lemon with a lime twist.

You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in regret for what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You give mammals a bad name. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation.

I barf at the very thought of you.

You have all the appeal of a paper cut.

Lepers avoid you. Syphilitics laugh at you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, a ferment, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren't an idiot, you've made a world-class effort at simulating one. Try to edit your writing of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.

You snail-skulled little twit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. Your hand refuses autoerotism. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meat slapper.

On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper.

You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on the warm side of Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid.

Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of your drivel.

The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn't really say anything.

Your attempt at constructing a creative post. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, count, and learn a language, any Language, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like parking in a handicapped space.

I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you (like passing gas or masturbating, for instance).

[thunderlizard]

Or if that argument had happened face to face:
"yeah mate, I 'spose so, fair point".

[Menelaus]

Not original but this one takes the prize for sheer venomous flaming.

You are a vulgar little maggot. Don't you know that you are pathetic? You worthless bag of filth. As they say in Texas, I'll bet you couldn't pour piss out of a boot with the instructions on the heel.

You are a canker. A sore that won't go away. I would rather kiss a lawyer on the lips than be seen with you. You are a fiend, a sniveling, spinless coward.

You have bad breath.

I feel debased just for knowing you exist. I despise everything about you especially your existence. You are a bloody nardless newbie twit rotohominid chromosomally aberrant caricature of a coprophagic cloacal parasitic pond scum.

I wish you would go away.

You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a putrefaction, a big suck on a sour lemon with a lime twist.

You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world. An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in regret for what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You give mammals a bad name. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation.

I barf at the very thought of you.

You have all the appeal of a paper cut.

Lepers avoid you. Syphilitics laugh at you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, a ferment, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren't an idiot, you've made a world-class effort at simulating one. Try to edit your writing of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.

You snail-skulled little twit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. Your hand refuses autoerotism. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meat slapper.

On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper.

You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on the warm side of Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. Your writing has to be a troll. Nothing in our universe can really be this stupid.

Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of your drivel.

The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn't really say anything.

Your attempt at constructing a creative post. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, count, and learn a language, any Language, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known, that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like parking in a handicapped space.

I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you (like passing gas or masturbating, for instance).

FFS.

That's a bit harsh, isn't it?

[Zippy]

Personally, I think you have to go a long way to beat 'You sir are a fookwit'

[DaveB]

FFS.

That's a bit harsh, isn't it?

I think that was the general idea.....

[Peoplesoft bloke]

I like the one from Rowan Atkinson's wedding speech - I wouldn't trust him to sit the right way round on a lavatory seat.

Or there's the old political one (you think things are bad now)

When they circumcised him, they threw the wrong bit away

[Numpty]

Shut your head and be pheasant!

I cannot remember where I got this from. Somewhere on the 'net, obviously.

Support good but you don't know to understand that. If you realize that it may that be supported problem to read, maybe you should shut your head and be pheasant.

Found it.