Just read this snippet from the Big Yins wife who happens to be a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.
What does the panel think ?
My relationship with my partner is excellent and I have never had such satisfying sex, but he is becoming addicted to my dressing up for him.
I feel self-conscious doing this, but he derives tremendous enjoyment from my efforts, and I almost always end up sexually satisfied. Can I continue to indulge his requests without risking any adverse consequences?
Response from Pamela Stephenson Connolly : clinical psychologist and psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.
Congratulations - you two have found a way to make sex exciting, satisfying and creative - and I doubt there's anything sinister about this. Your partner is not "addicted" - people are wired differently in terms of their sensory perception. He is very visually oriented, and that's why his eroticism is elevated by what he sees. He may be aroused by the silky touch of your lingerie, and his olfactory senses may be stimulated by particular perfumes. He is highly attuned sensually - which is a wonderful thing and appreciated by many women.
I wonder why it worries you? Perhaps you feel objectified in some way? Or under some kind of performance pressure? Are you less than confident about your body and wondering if the dressing up is being used to mask its flaws?
Try to pinpoint exactly what is bothering you - then decide if you want to risk addressing it. If so, be very gentle. I suspect that you were taught early on that sex should be dull, basic, and all about procreation - try to revise that opinion and simply allow yourself to enjoy it. Eroticism is a fantastic gift.
What does the panel think ?
My relationship with my partner is excellent and I have never had such satisfying sex, but he is becoming addicted to my dressing up for him.
I feel self-conscious doing this, but he derives tremendous enjoyment from my efforts, and I almost always end up sexually satisfied. Can I continue to indulge his requests without risking any adverse consequences?
Response from Pamela Stephenson Connolly : clinical psychologist and psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders.
Congratulations - you two have found a way to make sex exciting, satisfying and creative - and I doubt there's anything sinister about this. Your partner is not "addicted" - people are wired differently in terms of their sensory perception. He is very visually oriented, and that's why his eroticism is elevated by what he sees. He may be aroused by the silky touch of your lingerie, and his olfactory senses may be stimulated by particular perfumes. He is highly attuned sensually - which is a wonderful thing and appreciated by many women.
I wonder why it worries you? Perhaps you feel objectified in some way? Or under some kind of performance pressure? Are you less than confident about your body and wondering if the dressing up is being used to mask its flaws?
Try to pinpoint exactly what is bothering you - then decide if you want to risk addressing it. If so, be very gentle. I suspect that you were taught early on that sex should be dull, basic, and all about procreation - try to revise that opinion and simply allow yourself to enjoy it. Eroticism is a fantastic gift.
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