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is she spoilt?

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    is she spoilt?

    while out bimbling through the centre of Manchester yesterday, the wife drags me in to the Radley shop (handbags for those that dont or didnt know what it was either...).

    she spies a bag she fancies, and gives me the puppy eyes. it turns out this bag is limited edition (means it costs more than the normal ones), one of only 250. they apparently do this every year.

    She looks at me and wants one! i tell her if she wants one, get one. its pointless arguing, she'll only sulk.

    now, the day passes, she stops me buying a PS3 (at a cheaper cost than this bag!!!) cos i have a 360 and a wii. i make tea and generally do all the bits. i was feeling good yesterday and thought i would be nice.

    anyway, we go to bed. she wanders to bathroom as i get in the pit, and the next thing i realise, she has PJs on... this is odd as i know its not that time of the month (she is at least talking to me!). she rolls over, and goes to sleep. i get nothing. no kiss, no goodnight. i buy her a handbag and look after her, but i get nothing.

    What am i doing wrong? it wasnt that long since the time i would 'get' something in return without me asking.

    i think she has got used to getting what she wants. 7 years of being together with the last 4 being married, i think she has become complacent. what should i do? (other than go out and get the PS3 today with telling her! )

    I'll never understand women, but then i also think i'm going to stop buying her things. i'm not sure i even got a verbal thank you, but she did smile.
    I didn't say it was your ******* fault, I said I was blaming you!

    #2
    Originally posted by scooby View Post
    its pointless arguing, she'll only sulk.

    Sums up all we need to know. As a clue whether she's really spoilt, have a ganders at this article:

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/education/7308909.stm


    I'll let others offer advice on how to regain control, seeing as I have neither a girlfriend or kids.
    Feist - 1234. One camera, one take, no editing. Superb. How they did it
    Feist - I Feel It All
    Feist - The Bad In Each Other (Later With Jools Holland)

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      #3
      I've been wondering about your question on and off all day.

      is she spoilt?
      If you are treating her right, then yes. And so she should be. Wives should be kept in a perpetual state of being spoiled.

      Bear in mind I'm a bloke so any advice I give is probably wrong. You have been warned.

      Originally posted by scooby View Post
      ... she spies a bag she fancies, and gives me the puppy eyes. it turns out this bag is limited edition (means it costs more than the normal ones), one of only 250. they apparently do this every year.

      She looks at me and wants one!
      That sounds like a test. She's hurting and wants affection / attention / something from you. Either yu have forgotten something / talked about work all week / failed to listen to the problem she has been trying to hint about all week / she has been upset by somebody but can't tell you in case you get cross with her and so wants to see some sign of unconditional love from you.

      Originally posted by scooby View Post
      ... i was feeling good yesterday and thought i would be nice.

      anyway, we go to bed. she wanders to bathroom as i get in the pit, and the next thing i realise, she has PJs on... this is odd as i know its not that time of the month (she is at least talking to me!). she rolls over, and goes to sleep. i get nothing. no kiss, no goodnight. i buy her a handbag and look after her, but i get nothing.

      What am i doing wrong? it wasnt that long since the time i would 'get' something in return without me asking.
      You haven't passed her test yet. You need to give her something without her asking for it.

      Originally posted by scooby View Post
      i think she has got used to getting what she wants.
      A successful marriage is a never-ending trial. You have to work at it every day until you are dead. We should all be told that before we get engaged; not after we're married.

      Originally posted by scooby View Post
      7 years of being together with the last 4 being married, i think she has become complacent. what should i do? (other than go out and get the PS3 today with telling her! )

      I'll never understand women
      Good! If you did, they wouldn't be a challenge! But then, they don't understand us, either, which is odd since us blokes are very straightforward.

      Originally posted by scooby View Post
      , but then i also think i'm going to stop buying her things. i'm not sure i even got a verbal thank you, but she did smile.
      Spoil her. It's what she wants.

      Announce that you have decided this weekend has been a washout 'cos of the weather and that you are going to take a long weekend off next month to go to Paris. Or a quiet break somewhere nice.

      Tell her she's been dead good and supportive since Xmas and since year end is upon us you are going to blow some company profit on her. BUT: do not buy material things (shoes, handbags, iron (!) ) - spend it on something stupid and frivolous, like a short break for you both. DO NOT send her on her own to a beauty / therapy salon for a weekend: she needs to know you want her.



      Is she spoiled? No. If she's asking for things, it's because she wants you.


      I hope that helps.

      (PS was it her birthday last week? Wedding anniversary? The anniversary of the date you met / got engaged?)
      Drivelling in TPD is not a mental health issue. We're just community blogging, that's all.

      Xenophon said: "CUK Geek of the Week". A gingerjedi certified "Elitist Tw@t". Posting rated @ 5 lard points

      Comment


        #4
        BI - thats a really sweet answer..
        Bazza gets caught
        Socrates - "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."

        CUK University Challenge Champions 2010

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          #5
          Just tell her she's easily replaced.

          She'll toe the line, don't you worry.

          Keep em bare foot and pregnant I say.
          Last edited by Diver; 23 March 2008, 01:07.
          Confusion is a natural state of being

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by cailin maith View Post
            BI - thats a really sweet answer..
            Confusion is a natural state of being

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by cailin maith View Post
              BI - thats a really sweet answer..
              aw shucks!

              I must make amends...
              Drivelling in TPD is not a mental health issue. We're just community blogging, that's all.

              Xenophon said: "CUK Geek of the Week". A gingerjedi certified "Elitist Tw@t". Posting rated @ 5 lard points

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Diver View Post
                Just tell her she's easily replaced.

                She'll toe the line, don't you worry.

                Keep em bear foot and pregnant I say.
                You missed one: hungry, barefoot and pregnant.

                I suppose scooby could just get a Polish au pair and shaft her instead when the missus won't perform.
                Drivelling in TPD is not a mental health issue. We're just community blogging, that's all.

                Xenophon said: "CUK Geek of the Week". A gingerjedi certified "Elitist Tw@t". Posting rated @ 5 lard points

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by BrowneIssue View Post
                  You missed one: hungry, barefoot and pregnant.

                  I suppose scooby could just get a Polish au pair and shaft her instead when the missus won't perform.




                  I need an au pair
                  Confusion is a natural state of being

                  Comment


                    #10
                    BI actually made marriage sound hard enough in that post to make a man not bother.

                    Seems like a lot of effort. Pah.

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