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Reply to: I don't get sex

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Previously on "I don't get sex"

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  • vetran
    replied
    Originally posted by SimonMac View Post
    WHS + 1

    Would recommend Mrs V to all
    I think that is a Kylie!

    Leave a comment:


  • pjclarke
    replied
    So there's this guy researching the practice of having sexual relations with our ovine cousins, up in the Scottish Highlands he found the preferred technique is to insert one's partner's rear legs into the wellington boots to gain purchase, on the Yorkshire Moors he found the same favoured position. However when he asked the same question in Wales he was told they prefer to grasp the female firmly around the torso whilst celebrating the act of love.

    So he asked the Welsh smallholders if they had considered the legs-in-wellies option.

    'What?' came the incredulous reponse. 'No kissing!?'

    Leave a comment:


  • MicrosoftBob
    replied
    Originally posted by eek View Post
    So that's why BP spends weekends in North Wales.
    But does he still remember Flossie ?

    Leave a comment:


  • SimonMac
    replied
    Originally posted by vetran View Post
    unless you are lucky enough to marry someone as nice as Mrs V you won't get it then either.
    WHS + 1

    Would recommend Mrs V to all

    Leave a comment:


  • GlenW
    replied
    Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
    Men don't pay for sex.
    Married men do, trust me.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by GlenW View Post
    If you are just desperate to get sex then prostitutes are a lot cheaper than wives.
    Men don't pay for sex. They pay for women to go away after sex.

    Leave a comment:


  • GlenW
    replied
    If you are just desperate to get sex then prostitutes are a lot cheaper than wives.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by KentPhilip View Post
    Don't get married - get a cleaner
    FTFY

    PS Marriage is about 3 rings :-
    engagement
    wedding
    suffer

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
    There are sheep in Kent too. But not so many cliffs you can take them to the edge of so that they push back....
    So what are these?

    Leave a comment:


  • KentPhilip
    replied
    You say: "I don't get sex"

    Does that mean you don't get any, or you don't understand it?

    Either way, marriage is far from a guarantee of nookie. Although it is a good bet for the woman to make off with all your worldly possessions, including your house.

    I would recommend this:
    The Girlfriend Sequence | Daygame.com

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by GlenW View Post
    Don't get married it'll just end up with a nasty divorce, in my experience.
    Next time I'm just going to find someone I don't like and buy her a house.
    Is it true that the purpose of marriage is to find out what sort of woman your wife would have preferred?

    Leave a comment:


  • GlenW
    replied
    Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
    Maybe I should get married?
    Don't get married it'll just end up with a nasty divorce, in my experience.
    Next time I'm just going to find someone I don't like and buy her a house.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    Originally posted by eek View Post
    So that's why BP spends weekends in North Wales.
    There are sheep in Kent too. But not so many cliffs you can take them to the edge of so that they push back....

    Leave a comment:


  • eek
    replied
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    ftfy
    So that's why BP spends weekends in North Wales.

    Leave a comment:


  • Mich the Tester
    replied
    Originally posted by Pondlife View Post
    He didn't specify that it would be with another human.
    ftfy

    Leave a comment:

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