Reply to: My Uncle Ronnie died today

[BillHicksRIP]

WEOS. I carried my aunt's coffin when I was 18 or 19. It's something that just has to be done at some point and I see it now as an honour.

RIP.

[mudskipper]

What do you mean by carrying?? You mean the funeral arrangements etc?

My husband passed away a few years ago of cancer, and had to arrange a lot of things myself with my daughter, my son who was 18 was not in a good place to deal with it.

On the other hand we had a young girl who was a very close friend of my kids, she almost grew up in my house passing away a few months ago, both her parents (who are divorced) were devastated and just couldn't do anything, the girl's brother had to deal with the whole of the funeral arrangements, he was 18 as well, I couldn't believe how well he did, he arranged several services and meetups as many friends were from various parts of the country. He did so well.
So it all depends on the type of person your son is. But I agree its certainly good for them to handle various events of life the sooner the better.

Carrying, as in the coffin (pall bearing). I think a parent passing away is a different case to an elderly great-uncle. Unless they were very, very close he'll probably be fine.

[SandyD]

Now the hard part, arranging carrying for the funeral, speaking to his one surviving sister, my only remaining aunty, I really want to carry like I did for my mum and dad and two of my aunties, and I want my son to carry too, as a kind of generations thing.

My lad is only 18 but I think it's time for him to see a bit of real life, maybe I'm being a bit OTT tho....

Carrying is so hard, I've hated ever time I've done it but never regretted it, tough but part of life I feel...

What do you mean by carrying?? You mean the funeral arrangements etc?

My husband passed away a few years ago of cancer, and had to arrange a lot of things myself with my daughter, my son who was 18 was not in a good place to deal with it.

On the other hand we had a young girl who was a very close friend of my kids, she almost grew up in my house passing away a few months ago, both her parents (who are divorced) were devastated and just couldn't do anything, the girl's brother had to deal with the whole of the funeral arrangements, he was 18 as well, I couldn't believe how well he did, he arranged several services and meetups as many friends were from various parts of the country. He did so well.
So it all depends on the type of person your son is. But I agree its certainly good for them to handle various events of life the sooner the better.

[Lockhouse]

My condolences.

My Father-in-law who is nearly 87 and lives with my wife and I, saw action in Greece in 1944/45. When he was 17 he was working as a farmhand delivering cherries to the goods yards at Chatham in Kent when a V1 stopped dead above him. The next thing he remembers was being 20 yards away flat on his back. The dray wagon next to his truck with it's two shire horses had been blown to bits with the resultant mess everywhere. He was so incensed he went to the Army recruiting office straight from the station still covered head to foot in dust and horse gore, lied about his age and signed on for a seven year stint. Different breed in those days.

On the other hand, my uncle who died last year left me as his executor. I did the obligatory, sorted out the papers, funeral, dispensed his estate. A month after that the DWP inform me that he'd been fiddling his pension credits for 10 years, have opened an investigation and are just about to ask for most of his estate back. The beneficiaries have spent all the money, leaving me, as the executor, ultimately liable.

[stek]

18 is a good age. its a real and honorable responsibility

Cheers EO, thanks for that, it feels right - I won't push it tho, I'll suggest and hope.

[EternalOptimist]

Now the hard part, arranging carrying for the funeral, speaking to his one surviving sister, my only remaining aunty, I really want to carry like I did for my mum and dad and two of my aunties, and I want my son to carry too, as a kind of generations thing.

My lad is only 18 but I think it's time for him to see a bit of real life, maybe I'm being a bit OTT tho....

Carrying is so hard, I've hated ever time I've done it but never regretted it, tough but part of life I feel...

18 is a good age. its a real and honorable responsibility

[stek]

Now the hard part, arranging carrying for the funeral, speaking to his one surviving sister, my only remaining aunty, I really want to carry like I did for my mum and dad and two of my aunties, and I want my son to carry too, as a kind of generations thing.

My lad is only 18 but I think it's time for him to see a bit of real life, maybe I'm being a bit OTT tho....

Carrying is so hard, I've hated ever time I've done it but never regretted it, tough but part of life I feel...

[xoggoth]

My uncle was there too. I still have the Samurai sword he gave me that he took off a dead Jap. My metal baseball bat would probably be a more practical weapon in case of burglars but taking a head off like Tom Cruise did in 7th Samurai would be really cool.

[Moose423956]

Ditto my father, fought in India, Burma and Malaya. Never talked about it, hated the Japanese till the day he died for what they did.

I take great pride in the fact that my father and grandfather fought in both world wars, and I've had their medals framed professionally, look really spectacular.

All those old soldiers / sailors / airmen were heroes. My old man must be turning in his grave at some of the things that go on in this country. Well, he would be if he hadn't been cremated.

[Coalman]

My condolences.
My grandfather also served in the RAF in India during the war. I still don't know what he did. He didn't see my Dad for 5 years. He would send meccano (sp) back as you could not get it in the UK.
My other grandfather served in North Africa with the Desert Rats and was wounded there. Once he fully recovered he went to France on D-Day +5. He did mine clearance if what I've been told is true. Very brave man.



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[vetran]

My Grandfather spent 10 years in India in the RAF, before, during and after the war and would never speak of it. Seems to be a common theme.
.

Probably served with mine, he was in the RAF in India . he never spoke of it either.

[EternalOptimist]

my dad spent a few years in the far east on a carrier. They used to be based in Trincomalee in Ceylon, now Sri Lanka, and they whizzed around the Indian Ocean trying to find Japanese ships to sink.
When the allies started to push the japs back in Burma, they docked in a burmese port for a few days, and he saw this compound surrounded by a ditch and barbed wire.
At first he thought they were prisoners of war because they were ragged, covered in sores, filth and they stank. They glowered through the wire and he said he wasn't even sure if they were human.
Turned out they were British, just back from the jungle waiting to be de-loused, de-wormed and de-gunged
maybe Ronnie was amongst them.forgotten heroes in a forgotten war

[istvan]

My Condolences.

Many did us a silent service that we can't repay.

Indeed. My Condolences.

[Goatfell]

My Condolences.

Many did us a silent service that we can't repay.

Well put

[mudskipper]

RIP Ronnie.