Reply to: Writing mush in Valentine's cards

[EternalOptimist]

roses are red
and so are me socks
you know that i love you
cos
i eat the toffee chocs




i love your two fried eggs
i love your big smoked kippers
i root around in yer bra
and then in you big baggy knickers



hic

[Archangel]

Roses are red,
Violets are glorious,
Never creep up,
On Oscar Pistorius!


From various on twitter

[bless 'em all]

Roses are red
Marshmallow is sticky
If I tell you "I love you"
Will you suck on my .....

[Pondlife]

One for Aussielong;

My life it is lonely
Your smile makes me whole
I watch you each evening
as you dance round that pole

You charge me much less
than you do other punters
But I like you the best
as your colleagues are munters.

[TestMangler]

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Get in the van,
I've got a knife.........

[Doggy Styles]

Explain

It's like a Christmas Card list, but without the snowmen.

[DaveB]

[Platypus]

Does anyone else have a Valentine's list?

Explain

[Doggy Styles]

Does anyone else have a Valentine's list?

[suityou01]

This poetry's puerile
It's crude and it's crass
Now turn around baby
and show me that... nope again nothing.

[Pondlife]

This poetry's puerile
It's crude and it's crass
Now turn around baby
and show me that... nope again nothing.

[suityou01]

Roses are red,
Violets are pretty,
Stop reading this poem,
And let me suck on your titties

[Doggy Styles]

Red wine ain't white,
White wine ain't red,
Rip off your clothes,
And jump into bed!

I tried that once. She replied:

Jump into bed?
I beg your pardon!
I want to go out
And shag in the garden

[Pondlife]

Wine is fine,
Whisky is quicker,
Suck on me knob,
And I'll pay you five nicker.

I've paid you to be here
Don't look at the clock
Just take your damn money
and get on my.... Nope nothing.

[TestMangler]

Wine is fine,
Whisky is quicker,
Suck on me knob,
And I'll pay you five nicker.