Hospital visit - Contractor UK Bulletin Board

Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

You are not logged in. If you are already registered, fill in the form below to log in, or follow the "Sign Up" link to register a new account.
You may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

SupremeSpod replied

10 May 2012, 08:30
Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post

You mean he's had a thing transplant, and now it looks years younger?

It's amazing what doctors can do these days.

I doubt he'll be able to use it much, because as they say it's all in the mind.

I bet his wife hopes the swelling doesn't go down...
Leave a comment:
OwlHoot replied

10 May 2012, 08:25
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

But the old guy I'm sharing the ward with has got a pretty young thing. ...

You mean he's had a thing transplant, and now it looks years younger?

It's amazing what doctors can do these days.

I doubt he'll be able to use it much, because as they say it's all in the mind.
Leave a comment:
SimonMac replied

10 May 2012, 08:00
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

With a pipe in my pipe, I'm anxious not to cause any offence.

With a pipe in your pipe it wouldn't be causing offence I would be anxious about, its the barrage of pictures of semi naked ladies that are just about to be posted!!!
Leave a comment:
BrilloPad replied

10 May 2012, 06:25
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

I'm anxious not to cause any offence.

A mod not anxious to cause offence?

The operation has failed! Admin - get him back to theatre immediately.....
Leave a comment:
NotAllThere replied

10 May 2012, 05:12
With a pipe in my pipe, I'm anxious not to cause any offence.
Leave a comment:
EternalOptimist replied

9 May 2012, 19:25
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

Just had a sponge bath...

You made it.

God damn makes be proud to be British.

Whatever you do, dont grab the nurses tit. When you are better , I'll tell you the story
Leave a comment:
MarillionFan replied

9 May 2012, 19:01
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

Just had a sponge bath...

How do you get the icing sugar off???
Leave a comment:
NotAllThere replied

9 May 2012, 18:56
Just had a sponge bath...
Leave a comment:
MarillionFan replied

8 May 2012, 22:08
One two, drip on the floor.
Three four, drip no more.
Leave a comment:
Zippy replied

8 May 2012, 22:04
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

Nurses. With friends like that, who needs enemas?

Ooh Matron! Good luck NAT.
Leave a comment:
EternalOptimist replied

8 May 2012, 21:54
Originally posted by TimberWolf View Post

Also, beware of unpronounceable surnames.

Ivor Bollockoff
Mustaffa Gonad
Leave a comment:
TimberWolf replied

8 May 2012, 16:36
Also, beware of unpronounceable surnames.
Leave a comment:
TimberWolf replied

8 May 2012, 16:35
Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post

... and write an L on one and an R on the other, in felt tip, just in case they get the wrong one.

Your left or theirs? Might be easier just to write "not this one"*

*as long as you can be sure the "not" won't get rubbed off or be hidden behind something.
Leave a comment:
EternalOptimist replied

8 May 2012, 16:33
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

Nurses. With friends like that, who needs enemas?

laughter

the best medicine.
Leave a comment:
Old Greg replied

8 May 2012, 16:30
Originally posted by NotAllThere View Post

Just checked into the hospital for surgery tomorrow. Not bad. Free internet, with a good bandwidth. Reasonable menu, with a choice of wines.

It's a public ward, as I'm too tight to pay for a private room, so I'm having to share it with one other chap. Just need to find a way to stave off the boredom...

Pot noodle and invoicing is the traditional method.
Leave a comment: