Reply to: going private . . .

[DodgyAgent]

Aww DA, sorry to hear your kids are disappointed

FTFY

[DodgyAgent]

In that I believe you are wrong




But in this I think you are absolutely right.

IMHO.

Which presumes that kids grow up to be as they are no matter what environments they grow up in? Does this go so far as to include parenting? that good kids will grow up to be good people irrespective of their upbringing?

[mudskipper]

I am beginning to wonder if this was a thread enabling people to go on about how wonderful their kids are.

Can I just say to everyone "your kids may be of huge interest to you but they are of no interest to anyone else" I have brothers and sisters who constantly go on about their kids, I am too polite to tell them to stop it. I dont go on at all about mine and even if asked I will swiftly move to another subject.

Aww DA, sorry to hear your kids are a disappointment.

[Platypus]

I also believe private school will only 'seriously' benefit less bright children

In that I believe you are wrong

bright kids will do well at any school.

But in this I think you are absolutely right.

IMHO.

[Freamon]

The 17yr old is very bright, can play the guitar, drums and trumpet and is being courted by one of the Oxbridge colleges, whereas the 15yr old isn't that fussed, he isn't dumb far from it, but not that academic. Both had very same upbringing but both chalk and cheese when it comes to learning. My wife's niece and nephew had very same upbringing, but the niece went to uni and is now a teacher and her nephew does nothing all day and bums off the state. Go figure.

Hardly surprising. Often if the eldest is a high achiever, the younger ones give up competing early on and settle for second best, bumming around, never succeeding in anything.

My younger sibling is a complete diptulip, for example.

SAS

[Freamon]

out of hours activities are left to volunteers.

Presumably you've never asked any of the teachers you've met whether they spend any time conducting out of hours activities for their pupils then?

[Zoiderman]

Sorry Zoiderman, but I am tired of listening to friends and family going on about their kids. It is interesting that you seem to think that kids grow up according to nature rather than nurture.

I never thought it would be like that DA, but that's the way it's turned out with my kids, and all of my friends kids. I think there are many things nuture can do, but genuinely think by the time they're of the age I said, that their path is pretty set; some will be leaders, and some will be followers. Some of this is nuture, of course, but most is nature, I am sure of it. Some of it is just the way it is; the second kid will in no way ever have the same amout of attention the first did, etc, but ostensibly, yes, that's what I have observed.

And fair play about your first comment, I know I have to reign in my commentary sometimes amongst friends, as you do want to tell people that they're special, and it is tiresome. Facebook is full of friends showing their kids off, and I am not immune to this madness...

[DodgyAgent]

It was more a reflection as it doesn't make tulip difference as by a certain age, they're going to be, more or less, on a pattern in life that private school isn't going to change.

Each to their own btw.

Sorry Zoiderman, but I am tired of listening to friends and family going on about their kids. It is interesting that you seem to think that kids grow up according to nature rather than nurture.

[Zoiderman]

I am beginning to wonder if this was a thread enabling people to go on about how wonderful their kids are.

Can I just say to everyone "your kids may be of huge interest to you but they are of no interest to anyone else" I have brothers and sisters who constantly go on about their kids, I am too polite to tell them to stop it. I dont go on at all about mine and even if asked I will swiftly move to another subject.

It was more a reflection as it doesn't make tulip difference as by a certain age, they're going to be, more or less, on a pattern in life that private school isn't going to change.

Each to their own btw.

[DodgyAgent]

I think by the time your kids about 5/6 years old, they'll be what they're going to be. You can see in kids how they react to certain things, and that sort of shows what kind of people they are going to be. My eldest is very intelligent, despite being one of the years youngest (Late July birth), was at the top of her school in the SATs. She has to be pushed and doesn't really care about whether she learns or not, and would rather watch TV, or read a book of her choosing, than play piano, do hoemwork, etc. Middle child not as bright, academically, but is absolutely inthrall of everything she sees and touches, is curious about everything, and would rather be doing soemthing than watching TV. the third too young to say owt just now, but I think out of the two you can kind of understand, the less bright one, imo, will be more succesful.

A long post to say I think kids will have set their stall out early in life. I also believe private school will only 'seriously' benefit less bright children, and that bright kids will do well at any school.

Just my 5 pence

I am beginning to wonder if this was a thread enabling people to go on about how wonderful their kids are.

Can I just say to everyone "your kids may be of huge interest to you but they are of no interest to anyone else" I have brothers and sisters who constantly go on about their kids, I am too polite to tell them to stop it. I dont go on at all about mine and even if asked I will swiftly move to another subject.

[Zoiderman]

I think by the time your kids about 5/6 years old, they'll be what they're going to be. You can see in kids how they react to certain things, and that sort of shows what kind of people they are going to be. My eldest is very intelligent, despite being one of the years youngest (Late July birth), was at the top of her school in the SATs. She has to be pushed and doesn't really care about whether she learns or not, and would rather watch TV, or read a book of her choosing, than play piano, do hoemwork, etc. Middle child not as bright, academically, but is absolutely inthrall of everything she sees and touches, is curious about everything, and would rather be doing soemthing than watching TV. the third too young to say owt just now, but I think out of the two you can kind of understand, the less bright one, imo, will be more succesful.

A long post to say I think kids will have set their stall out early in life. I also believe private school will only 'seriously' benefit less bright children, and that bright kids will do well at any school.

Just my 5 pence

[quackhandle]

My nephews are now 17 and 15, their arsehole dad f**ked off when they were very young and has only just recently started paying any maintenance. So both went through the state school system, infants and junior had high OFSTEAD grades, but it was down the road anyway so they learned to walk to school in all weathers. They are attending same secondary school as the one I went to, but it is now a maths and technical college as well. But from day one, my sister installed the ethic of "learning does not stop at home".

The 17yr old is very bright, can play the guitar, drums and trumpet and is being courted by one of the Oxbridge colleges, whereas the 15yr old isn't that fussed, he isn't dumb far from it, but not that academic. Both had very same upbringing but both chalk and cheese when it comes to learning. My wife's niece and nephew had very same upbringing, but the niece went to uni and is now a teacher and her nephew does nothing all day and bums off the state. Go figure.

qh

[Mich the Tester]

You had to share your trust fund with your family?

Unfortunately yes, and still do. Take pity on me; I've just had a big bill for moat cleaning and I'm not a tory MP. Yet.

[Arturo Bassick]

You mean you grew up without a family trust fund? My dear fellow, how DID you cope? Did you have nutritional deficiencies too?

You had to share your trust fund with your family?

[Mich the Tester]

I'd like to send my kids private if I ever have any.

I went to a comp in a small town. Wasn't a terrible school but I don't have anything to compare it with. From age 5 to age 16 the normal class size was 30. In the last year if you chose an unpopular subject you could get a class of fewer than ten.

Some of the teachers weren't very good and there were entire top stream classes that didn't register a single A in some subjects.

There was a limited choice of subjects.

There wasn't much extra-curricular stuff.

So I think we could do a bit better than that.

The cost, however, is problematic.

Imagine my surprise when my current girlfriend dropped, from nowhere, in to conversation that her brother was going to send his kids private and it would be paid for by her family trust fund. Um, what? You have a family trust fund?

You mean you grew up without a family trust fund? My dear fellow, how DID you cope? Did you have nutritional deficiencies too?