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Previously on "Rules of the workplace lavatory"

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  • psychocandy
    replied
    Originally posted by wurzel View Post
    Never liked those bogs with partition walls that don't go all the way up.

    Remember one time I was working in Dubai , I went to the bog & became suddenly aware of a presence. I looked up & there was the face of the office boy staring down at me.

    Said he was washing his feet for prayers
    Always wondered why bogs in the US have huge gaps at the bottom of the partitions. And a huge gap between the door and frame....

    Leave a comment:


  • Paula
    replied
    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
    Striking up a conversation with the person next to you at the urinals. My small cock is in my hand, I'm having a piss, but now I have a shy bladder. I feel inadequate'

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by doodab View Post
    I generally don't worry about conversations too much, although I do get slightly unsettled when people comment on the fact I am urinating 'hands free'





    Yeah. People occasionally comment about my tripod, sou'wester and oilskins, but I prefer not to get drawn into a conversation



    Leave a comment:


  • doodab
    replied
    I generally don't worry about conversations too much, although I do get slightly unsettled when people comment on the fact I am urinating 'hands free'

    Leave a comment:


  • wobbegong
    replied
    Originally posted by thunderlizard View Post
    I have been weeing (on and off) for over 3 decades now.
    I'd get your prostate checked if I were you, TL.

    Originally posted by thunderlizard View Post
    I have been checking my emails while sitting on the lav for a number of years, and I almost always manage it without getting cack all over the place.


    That's all, just

    Leave a comment:


  • thunderlizard
    replied
    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
    Striking up a conversation with the person next to you at the urinals. My cock is in my hand, I'm having a piss, I don't want to know about 'What you had for lunch','What youre' doing at the weekend','The price of gold','Or who your wife is sleeping with'
    I don't start urinal conversations because I know lots of people have this view. But if people start talking to me, it does not bother me in the slightest. For I have been weeing (on and off) for over 3 decades now, and I like to think I'm pretty successful at it. I only need to devote a small percentage of my brain power to it, leaving the rest free to converse with my fellow man.

    Equally, I have been checking my emails while sitting on the lav for a number of years, and I almost always manage it without getting cack all over the place.

    Leave a comment:


  • wobbegong
    replied
    Originally posted by SimonMac View Post
    If its brown, flush it down.
    If its yellow, let it mellow!
    Originally posted by thunderlizard View Post
    & if it's black, phone the quack!
    & if it's red, you'll soon be dead.

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    One of the worst client bogs was a mail order games software unit, near Windsor about 11 years ago.
    They had a big sign in the traps saying 'Use the toilet brush when finished'
    At least at Barclays we had toilet paper




    Leave a comment:


  • doodab
    replied
    If you plan to disappear in there with one of the hr girls for a cheeky line make sure you have access to the relevant cctv system. Which i think boils down to 'be nice to security' as someone said earlier.

    Leave a comment:


  • thunderlizard
    replied
    Originally posted by SimonMac View Post
    If its brown, flush it down.
    If its yellow, let it mellow!
    & if it's black, phone the quack!

    Leave a comment:


  • d000hg
    replied
    Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
    Striking up a conversation with the person next to you at the urinals. "My cock is in my hand"
    Interesting conversation starter.

    Originally posted by Chaffinch View Post
    Erm, erm ................ thanks for sharing ........................erm

    I was thinking along the lines of:

    "Always wash your hands afterwards"

    but, erm, ta
    We probably gave you too much credit assuming you knew that one.

    Originally posted by wurzel View Post
    Never liked those bogs with partition walls that don't go all the way up.

    Remember one time I was working in Dubai , I went to the bog & became suddenly aware of a presence. I looked up & there was the face of the office boy staring down at me.

    Said he was washing his feet for prayers
    Not quite the same, but ones where the door leaves a gap when shut, seemed very common in the US... anyone walking past can see in if they choose.

    Leave a comment:


  • filthy1980
    replied
    Originally posted by Freamon View Post
    If you are in a building which has a floor containing mainly HR, that is usually the best one to go to. The gents will be a "safe zone" hardly ever visited. This works even better if you are working at a retailer and they have a floor for the clothing department staff.
    this

    or can't believe no-one has mentioned the disabled

    just be careful and don't get the pull switches mixed up as i did, it can be quite embarrassing being met by the cavalry on exit

    Leave a comment:


  • Freamon
    replied
    Originally posted by SneakySimon View Post
    Leaving the seat down and then peeing. Drops of p!ss all over the seat are not cool when I need my 30 min toilet break.

    I have an unproved suspicion that seems to be a Bob thing - we just had a group of 10 blokes and since then, I have had to go to a differnt floor.
    If you are in a building which has a floor containing mainly HR, that is usually the best one to go to. The gents will be a "safe zone" hardly ever visited. This works even better if you are working at a retailer and they have a floor for the clothing department staff.

    Leave a comment:


  • CheeseSlice
    replied
    Originally posted by TonyEnglish View Post
    At BT they had load of Bobs and they all would head off to the bogs and gob flem into the sinks. It soundded disgusting.
    Then you get the ones that clear out their nostrils by snorting them out one at a time and as loudly as possible down the plughole.... well i hope it goes down there and not all over the taps!

    Leave a comment:


  • BillHicksRIP
    replied
    Originally posted by TonyEnglish View Post
    At BT they had load of Bobs and they all would head off to the bogs and gob flem into the sinks. It sounded disgusting.
    Have seen that so many times. Turns my stomach. They're not clearing the Delhi traffic fumes and dust off the back of their throats in Hertfordshire ffs.

    Leave a comment:

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