Wife is away til Wednesday next week. - Contractor UK Bulletin Board

Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

You are not logged in or you do not have permission to access this page. This could be due to one of several reasons:

You are not logged in. If you are already registered, fill in the form below to log in, or follow the "Sign Up" link to register a new account.
You may not have sufficient privileges to access this page. Are you trying to edit someone else's post, access administrative features or some other privileged system?
If you are trying to post, the administrator may have disabled your account, or it may be awaiting activation.

Old Greg replied

23 September 2011, 17:24
Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

Kiss my chuddies.

Chuddies

Effeminate underwear, briefs (usually) with no "Y-fronts", jocks, panties, knickers. Origin of word - Punjabi (India/Pakistan). Popularised in British English by usage in BBC comedy series "Goodness Gracious Me".

So basically, manties. You are full of surprises. I must, however, decline.
Leave a comment:
Zippy replied

23 September 2011, 17:14
Originally posted by sasguru View Post

I would lick the chutney spoon and put it back.
Then bleed the radiators.

Scraggie has been here a while so I'd guess this has already been done.
Leave a comment:
MarillionFan replied

23 September 2011, 17:13
Originally posted by Old Greg View Post

A strong marriage is built on the twin foundation stones of love and respect. The actions I described would be both loving and respectful.

Perhaps it is time for you to consider growing up.

Kiss my chuddies.
Leave a comment:
Old Greg replied

23 September 2011, 17:11
Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post

Is he having a laff? IS HE HAVING A LAFF?

A strong marriage is built on the twin foundation stones of love and respect. The actions I described would be both loving and respectful.

Perhaps it is time for you to consider growing up.
Leave a comment:
MarillionFan replied

23 September 2011, 17:05
Originally posted by Old Greg View Post

Clean the house until it's absolutely spoltless. Then do all those little DIY jobs that you keep meaning to get done. Do a grocery shop and get all of her favourite things. Then go shopping in town and buy her a lavish present and some beautiful flowers. She'll be delighted!

Is he having a laff? IS HE HAVING A LAFF?
Leave a comment:
Pondlife replied

23 September 2011, 16:59
Firstly you should rent some films about Gladiators
Next, try and see a grown man naked.

HTH
Leave a comment:
original PM replied

23 September 2011, 16:59
Originally posted by Old Greg View Post

Clean the house until it's absolutely spoltless. Then do all those little DIY jobs that you keep meaning to get done. Do a grocery shop and get all of her favourite things. Then go shopping in town and buy her a lavish present and some beautiful flowers. She'll be delighted!

If you do this

Originally posted by Paddy View Post

As a joke leave a pair of strange panties in the bed,

she will assume this anyway
Leave a comment:
Old Greg replied

23 September 2011, 16:55
Originally posted by Paddy View Post

As a joke leave a pair of strange panties in the bed,

Or even manties.
Leave a comment:
Old Greg replied

23 September 2011, 16:54
Originally posted by sasguru View Post

You're on the wrong forum. Mumsnet is over there.

Back on the naughty step, young man!
Leave a comment:
Paddy replied

23 September 2011, 16:43
As a joke leave a pair of strange panties in the bed,
Leave a comment:
sasguru replied

23 September 2011, 16:32
Originally posted by Old Greg View Post

Clean the house until it's absolutely spoltless. Then do all those little DIY jobs that you keep meaning to get done. Do a grocery shop and get all of her favourite things. Then go shopping in town and buy her a lavish present and some beautiful flowers. She'll be delighted!

You're on the wrong forum. Mumsnet is over there.
Leave a comment:
Old Greg replied

23 September 2011, 16:30
Clean the house until it's absolutely spoltless. Then do all those little DIY jobs that you keep meaning to get done. Do a grocery shop and get all of her favourite things. Then go shopping in town and buy her a lavish present and some beautiful flowers. She'll be delighted!
Leave a comment:
ChrisPackit replied

23 September 2011, 14:09
Saturday: Join a Speed Dating meeting down the road and see how many phone numbers you can get by telling the ladies you're an astronaut.

Sunday: Invite the neighbours round for a Cinzano or two followed by Naked Twister.

Hope this helps...
Leave a comment:
PRC1964 replied

23 September 2011, 13:46
Eat, drink and play to excess.

Over-do it all so much that that when your wife does return, your body physically craves celery, green tea and early nights.
Leave a comment:
MarillionFan replied

23 September 2011, 13:37
<insert w@nk like a monkey smiley here>
Leave a comment: