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Reply to: I feel a bit sick

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Previously on "I feel a bit sick"

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  • MaryPoppins
    replied
    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    The other week I bought a pack of beef jerky at Sainsbury's. In it was included a small postage-stamp-sized packet of what I assumed was pepper, which I opened with some difficulty and sprinkled over the meat.

    I thought it tasted a bit vile & metallic, not much like pepper, but having had a few drinks soldiered on until I'd wolfed down the lot.

    Only then did I notice a large warning on the packet "DO NOT EAT"

    It appeared the packet was to absorb moisture, like those similar packets they put in electronic equipment, the ones that contain Silica gel which is supposed to be highly toxic

    (but I later found isn't, unless you eat crazy amounts or it has absorbed some other toxic liquid)


    This has really tickled me. I like how thorough you were.

    Leave a comment:


  • OwlHoot
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    I nicked some of the missus sweeties off the kitchen table last night, raisins in white chocolate in a half empty bag. They tasted a bit funny, but what the heck. ...
    The other week I bought a pack of beef jerky at Sainsbury's. In it was included a small postage-stamp-sized packet of what I assumed was pepper, which I opened with some difficulty and sprinkled over the meat.

    I thought it tasted a bit vile & metallic, not much like pepper, but having had a few drinks soldiered on until I'd wolfed down the lot.

    Only then did I notice a large warning on the packet "DO NOT EAT"

    It appeared the packet was to absorb moisture, like those similar packets they put in electronic equipment, the ones that contain Silica gel which is supposed to be highly toxic

    (but I later found isn't, unless you eat crazy amounts or it has absorbed some other toxic liquid)

    Leave a comment:


  • Drewster
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    heh heh

    I like you



    Awwwww shucks..... faaaanks!!

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by Drewster View Post
    Tabasco would be much better.........

    Your Mrs might not like it....
    The cats won't like it....
    but it would give us a good laugh....
    heh heh

    I like you



    Leave a comment:


  • Churchill
    replied
    Originally posted by Drewster View Post
    Tabasco would be much better.........

    Your Mrs might not like it....
    The cats won't like it....
    but it would give us a good laugh....

    Leave a comment:


  • Drewster
    replied
    Originally posted by Churchill View Post
    Smear Marmite round your ringpiece - the missus might not like marmite but the cats will.
    Tabasco would be much better.........

    Your Mrs might not like it....
    The cats won't like it....
    but it would give us a good laugh....

    Leave a comment:


  • Churchill
    replied
    Originally posted by chef View Post
    or possibly just some toilet roll, go for the ones with balsamic to make it taste nicer
    FTFY!

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by Churchill View Post
    Smear Marmite round your ringpiece - the missus might not like marmite but the cats will.
    they wont go near it, not after what happened last time





    Leave a comment:


  • chef
    replied
    or possibly just some toilet roll, go for the ones with basalm to make it feel nicer

    Leave a comment:


  • Churchill
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




    Smear Marmite round your ringpiece - the missus might not like marmite but the cats will.

    Leave a comment:


  • doodab
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




    Rather than using your tongue to make the transfer, why not try a finger?

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by Churchill View Post
    They like yeast so that's probably why they licked your grapes!

    Failing that it was to get their own back for you pinching their treats!
    You just gave me a stunning idea. Not being a contortionist, I cant manage to lick my own bum, then their cat-treats, but I think the missus might go for it. Might cost me a handbag though




    Leave a comment:


  • Churchill
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    Then I watched Brewster-Roustabout cleaning her bum hole with her little pink darting tongue.

    Now listen to this - cats are CARNIVORES, right ? well this little b@stard jumped onto the kitchen table and started to lick the purple grapes. MY purple grapes.

    I feel a bit sick



    They like yeast so that's probably why they licked your grapes!

    Failing that it was to get their own back for you pinching their treats!

    Leave a comment:


  • doodab
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    Now listen to this - cats are CARNIVORES, right ? well this little b@stard jumped onto the kitchen table and started to lick the purple grapes. MY purple grapes.
    Piles eh? You should get them sorted, they will only get worse.

    Leave a comment:


  • DiscoStu
    replied

    Leave a comment:

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