Reply to: Alton Towers problem..

[chef]

Sad thing is the birds fall for Chef's bull-sheet.

I believe the word your looking for is romance. You should try it one day sas, then that Yaris of yours might get it's springs tested a bit more than simply the weight of your fat ass on them..

Oh and FYI, yes she has "fallen for it", I got a reply of

"That seems a pretty hard mission. I would therefore require another professional to escort me. As this choice has to be well considered, I need to analyse if Agent <chef> has the physical and mental strength in pre-mission preparations.

My research so far attests that Agent <chef>, though he can be sneaky in the way he looks after his own personal interests and agenda, he still has a certain creative energy and charm.
I am pretty sure that these traits could be mixed to make this mission even more explosive.
As you may well understand I need to protect my health, so I am asking myself: What do I gain when choosing this particular agent? And could I be sure to have his full support in order to complete this mission successfully?
regards
<gf chef>"

no further replies are going to be posted, suffice to say Chef is going to Alton Towers on Friday and looks like he's going to be rewarded for the effort aswell.

Mission accomplished

[sasguru]

And easily put down:

"UNFERTILISED"

Sad thing is the birds fall for Chef's bull-sheet.

[Moscow Mule]

You are so chav.

"How do you prefer you eggs in the morning" is so much more upmarket.....

And easily put down:

"UNFERTILISED"

[cojak]

I love you more and more each day

thanks.

I've decided that making her smile would be the better option. I know she wont check her email until this evening so I sent her some flowers to her work with the message "Secret Agent <gf chef> your secret mission details have been sent to you by electronic mail" followed by an email written in the style of a secret agent mission brief beginning with

"TOP SECRET: Your mission if you choose to accept it is as follows.."

and then goes on to detail the postcode location, the photographs required, suggested fellow agents she might like to take along, plans of the top secret location (map of the theme park) etc etc. I suggested in preparation for this difficult task she should take advantage of the excellent facilities of the local Hilton Spa the evening before.

Ending the message of course with "This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.."

Uber geeky I know, but I figure it's the best chance I have of convincing her.. and either way she'll be extra nice over the weekend for being imaginative and going to so much effort..

we'll see

Oh my gosh!

I think I'm developing a Bridget Jones style crush myself, actually...

[BrilloPad]

FFS! What's wrong with "get yer coat, luv, you've pulled".

Yoof of today.

You are so chav.

"How do you prefer you eggs in the morning" is so much more upmarket.....

[sasguru]

thanks.

I've decided that making her smile would be the better option. I know she wont check her email until this evening so I sent her some flowers to her work with the message "Secret Agent <gf chef> your secret mission details have been sent to you by electronic mail" followed by an email written in the style of a secret agent mission brief beginning with

"TOP SECRET: Your mission if you choose to accept it is as follows.."

and then goes on to detail the postcode location, the photographs required, suggested fellow agents she might like to take along, plans of the top secret location (map of the theme park) etc etc. I suggested in preparation for this difficult task she should take advantage of the excellent facilities of the local Hilton Spa the evening before.

Ending the message of course with "This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.."

Uber geeky I know, but I figure it's the best chance I have of convincing her.. and either way she'll be extra nice over the weekend for being imaginative and going to so much effort..

we'll see

FFS! What's wrong with "get yer coat, luv, you've pulled".

Yoof of today.

[Platypus]

watching a movie with gf chef or out having thrills on rollercoasters with gf chef.. gf chef being the common point, just in case you didn't work that out

Sounds like you're falling in luuurve

[BrilloPad]

my missus hates spiders. I just had this thought of introducing her to a little money spider, then a daddy longlegs and eventually a big hairy tarantula.

lol

why not ask her what she wants to do

Our neighbour hates spiders. She bought her daughter a toy spider so she would not inherit her phobia. Alas the neighbour cannot bear to touch it and to put it in a toy box flicks it with a broom!

[Mich the Tester]

edit: when it comes to women, im much more a 'bum man' than a 'breast man'

I like both. I do rather like the buxom blonde Germanic types, as you would see if you met Mrs Tester.

[chef]

You have the prospect of a sunny weekend in the beautiful free state of Bavaria, surrounded by ample breasted waitresses serving stiefels of fine beer and you want to go to Alton Towers?

yes, exactly. your 143 IQ is proving itself

I have the Bavarian "view" every evening and after a while the roast pork with huge dumpling noodles and litres of bavarian beer shared with the only english guy on this project gets a bit tedius and doesn't compare to being back in my own home watching a movie with gf chef or out having thrills on rollercoasters with gf chef.. gf chef being the common point, just in case you didn't work that out

edit: when it comes to women, im much more a 'bum man' than a 'breast man'

[BoredBloke]

We go to Alton Towers a lot. My son loves it. Because he is disabled we don't have to queue up - You could take him if you want. You'll get on all the top rides many times over to the point that you'll be sick of them by the end of the day

[Mich the Tester]

You have the prospect of a sunny weekend in the beautiful free state of Bavaria, surrounded by ample breasted waitresses serving stiefels of fine beer and you want to go to Alton Towers?

[Moscow Mule]

Take her to Air.

That ride is so cool it's unbelievable. Not scary in the slightest, but just very cool.

I haven't been to Alton Towers for ages, and Mrs MM is coaster-phobic too - so you have my sympathies chef...

[Pogle]

thanks.

I've decided that making her smile would be the better option. I know she wont check her email until this evening so I sent her some flowers to her work with the message "Secret Agent <gf chef> your secret mission details have been sent to you by electronic mail" followed by an email written in the style of a secret agent mission brief beginning with

"TOP SECRET: Your mission if you choose to accept it is as follows.."

and then goes on to detail the postcode location, the photographs required, suggested fellow agents she might like to take along, plans of the top secret location (map of the theme park) etc etc. I suggested in preparation for this difficult task she should take advantage of the excellent facilities of the local Hilton Spa the evening before.

Ending the message of course with "This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.."

Uber geeky I know, but I figure it's the best chance I have of convincing her.. and either way she'll be extra nice over the weekend for being imaginative and going to so much effort..

we'll see

Top marks!
She's a lucky girl

[chef]

I love you more and more each day

thanks.

I've decided that making her smile would be the better option. I know she wont check her email until this evening so I sent her some flowers to her work with the message "Secret Agent <gf chef> your secret mission details have been sent to you by electronic mail" followed by an email written in the style of a secret agent mission brief beginning with

"TOP SECRET: Your mission if you choose to accept it is as follows.."

and then goes on to detail the postcode location, the photographs required, suggested fellow agents she might like to take along, plans of the top secret location (map of the theme park) etc etc. I suggested in preparation for this difficult task she should take advantage of the excellent facilities of the local Hilton Spa the evening before.

Ending the message of course with "This message will self destruct in 5 seconds.."

Uber geeky I know, but I figure it's the best chance I have of convincing her.. and either way she'll be extra nice over the weekend for being imaginative and going to so much effort..

we'll see