Reply to: Limerick time

[DaveB]

Doom Doom Doom Doom
Boom Boom Boom Boom
Credit crash No Cash
Values falling all appalling
Now we're feked by Global warming

Does Baldrick know your plagiarising his work? Does he even know what plagiarising means? Did the Venga Boys ever pay the royalties they owed him?

Baldrick: This one is called "The German Guns."

George: Oh, spiffing! Yes, let's hear that!

Baldrick: "Boom boom boom boom / Boom boom boom / BOOM BOOM, BOOM BOOM--

Edmund: "BOOM BOOM BOOM"?

Baldrick: How did you guess, sir?

George: I say, sir! That is spooky!

[Diver]

Doom Doom Doom Doom
Boom Boom Boom Boom
Credit crash No Cash
Values falling all appalling
Now we're feked by Global warming

[realityhack]

Mary had a little lamb
He worked P.A.Y.E.
And that lamb had a little plan
To earn a better fee

So lamb went to a bureau
And told them of his skills
They said they'd find him solvency
On them there greener hills

They sent him across the vale
To see the shepherd chief
He scoped his talents in detail
Meeting the client brief

The shepherd was very pleased
And said: "when can you start?
Your rate - one bale of hay a day
Means you have got the part"

Our little lamb was angry
That's not what he agreed
The nice man at the agency
Promised three blocks of feed

Lamb kept his calm composure
Said he: "I'll be in touch"
And walked away without delay
To discuss just how much

The agency could offer
And lamb found them quite rude:
"The client's budget has been slashed
And now he has less food

The shepherd really liked you
Agreed you have the skills
But in this market lots more sheep
Compete to graze these hills"

Now lamb he was dumbfounded
Said he: "This is my rate
I cited in the interview,
Not open to debate"

They said: "Show us the contract"
And lamb replied "What's that?"
Though lamb could lead he could not read
His argument fell flat

Lamb said in desperation
"I took you at your word!"
Across the floor lamb was quite sure
Faint laughter could be heard

So lamb went back to Mary
And took his old job back
He settled for a lower rate
And no plan of attack

Now Mary is delighted
It works like this you see
When lamb trains up his replacement
She'll have him grilled for tea

[KentPhilip]

Mary Had a lilltle lamb.
It's **** turned to a fanny.
Now everywhere that Mary goes
she's followed by a Tranny

Mary had a little bear
To which she was very kind
And everywhere that Mary went
You could see her bear behind

Mary had a little bike
she rode it on the grass
and everytime the wheel went round
the seat went up her ****

Mary had a little lamb,
She kept it in a bucket,
And everytime the lamb got out
Her father tried to....

[oracleslave]

Mary dressed her little lamb
In jackboots hose and garter
She sent it off to Amsterdam
To profit from its charter

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a duck
She put them on the mantlepiece
to see if they would f....all off

[realityhack]

Mary dressed her little lamb
In jackboots hose and garter
She sent it off to Amsterdam
To profit from its charter

[KentPhilip]

Mary had a little lamb
She tied it to a pylon
10,000 volts passed through its fleece
and turned its wool to nylon

fond memories of being a student

[DaveB]

Limericks done well
A Poetic elegance
Reduced to Drivel

DaveB

[realityhack]

Incognito is a complete retard
His mates hold him in low regard
His posts are absurd
Because he's a turd
He gets hoist with his own petard

In trying to make your lines scan
Consider this constructive plan:
eight, eight, six, six, eight
A correct spelling state
And rhyme back to where you began.

[foritisme]

Where on the board is the totty
I be happy with just one hottie
To dream of all day
To send innuendos her way
and for her to send pics of her bottie

[portseven]

Lived in Limerick for a few years, rough as a badgers arse

[Incognito]

Incognito is a complete retard
His mates hold him in low regard
His posts are absurd
Because he's a turd
He gets hoist with his own petard

Sas is a nerd and a clod.
He's a crumb and a wearisome sod.
He's a hog and a sham,
A punk and a ham,
A simian sow and a fraud

[bogeyman]

There was a young chap named Dim Prawn
who was often found posting at dawn
from the Mail he quoted
to his fans most devoted
but mostly he made us all yawn

[sasguru]

Incognito is a complete retard
His mates hold him in low regard
His posts are absurd
Because he's a turd
He gets hoist with his own petard

[Incognito]

Incognito is a total fool
The cretinous drool
on his face
looks like a mental case
And makes him a complete tool

Sas is a sickening fraud.
He's a putrified jerk and a sod.
He's a meaningless meanie,
A goon and a weenie,
And his mind is offensive and odd