Viz-esque Top Tips ! - Contractor UK Bulletin Board

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Lucifer Box replied

29 January 2008, 14:29
Originally posted by Bod View Post

Don't waste any unfinished bottles of Sunny Delight, simply boil it up with potato peelings and make your own marmalade.

Shhhh... don't give the game away.
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Bod replied

29 January 2008, 14:28
Originally posted by Lucifer Box View Post

It's certainly worked for me. I can highly recommend it.

Don't waste any unfinished bottles of Sunny Delight, simply boil it up with potato peelings and make your own marmalade.
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Lucifer Box replied

29 January 2008, 14:17
Originally posted by wobbegong View Post

Avoid having to read thread-hijacking tosh from Lucy by simply placing her on your ignore list.

It's certainly worked for me. I can highly recommend it.
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NickFitz replied

29 January 2008, 14:16
Soil keeps better if you dip it in vinegar first.
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Bod replied

29 January 2008, 13:42
Protect your new luxury contractor carpets by covering the entire surface with empty cereal boxes
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ChimpMaster replied

29 January 2008, 13:33
CONTRACTORS - increase your take home pay by opening a Ltd Co, paying yourself a small salary and taking the rest out as dividends. To really push the boat out, don't declare the dividends and enjoy enjoy enjoy!
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wobbegong replied

29 January 2008, 12:11
Originally posted by Churchill View Post

No FO!

Avoid having to read thread-hijacking tosh from Lucy by simply placing her on your ignore list.
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Churchill replied

29 January 2008, 10:14
Originally posted by Lucy View Post

Can the US funded overthrow of Prince Sihanouk be justified as an application of real politic, discuss.

No FO!
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Lucy replied

29 January 2008, 10:05
Can the US funded overthrow of Prince Sihanouk be justified as an application of real politic, discuss.
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gingerjedi replied

29 January 2008, 10:00
Drill a one inch diameter hole in your refrigerator door. This will allow you to check that the light goes off when the door is closed.
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Ruprect replied

29 January 2008, 09:44
Originally posted by Bod View Post

Milan, avoid expensive training courses by digging out an old VCR, then simply insert and eject tapes for a few days.
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Bod replied

29 January 2008, 09:33
Milan, avoid expensive training courses by digging out an old VCR, then simply insert and eject tapes for a few days.

Last edited by Bod; 29 January 2008, 09:37.
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51st State replied

29 January 2008, 09:12
Originally posted by Bod View Post

That's good advice DA !

Manchester United fans. Save money on expensive new kits by simply strapping a large fake penis to your forehead. It is now clear to all, as to your allegiance.
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Bod replied

29 January 2008, 08:31
Originally posted by Churchill View Post

EMPLOYERS Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the CVs into the bin.

That's good advice DA !

Manchester United fans. Save money on expensive new kits by simply strapping a large fake penis to your forehead. It is now clear to all, as to your allegiance.
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HYpno27 replied

29 January 2008, 08:29
Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand closer to the object you wish to view
or
Minor skin grafts can be performed on pigs by covering any cuts and grazes with thin strips of bacon
or
Deter goldfish from having sex by throwing a small bucket of air over any that you catch in the act
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