The "Er Indoors" thread

[darmstadt]

I cant argue with her as we have a simmering truce on account of me not getting back from my lunch until 5.00 am this morning.

Is that all? I did my Christmas thing last weekend:

- went to the pub at 18:00
- left pub at 20:00 to go to Kegelbahn
- left Kegelbahn at 23:00 and went to pub
- left pub at 04:00 to go to another pub
- left other pub at 15:25 and walked next door to other pub
- met missus and order half litre of Apfelwein
- started to drink and watch footie and missus realised I was drunk as a skunk and dragged me out out at 16:00 and put me to bed
- Got up next morning and eventually had some food

Sad, but might do it again today

[oracleslave]

"Thank ou thank you thank you . Can I just say what a pleasure it is to be invited to attend this wonderful occasion. I feel humbled just to be here let alone to be awarded the evenings top award."

"I would like to say that this award is not just about me, and I would particularly like to thank my parents. Whoever and wherever you are "sob" (fighting back the tears) I love you, all three of you. I would also like to thank all my friends and relatives who are unable to make it here tonight to share this wonderful occasion."

Awards Presenter: "well DA we have a surprise for you, because we have connected through to Belmarsh and brought together all your friends and family into the Belmarsh prison phone box to speak to you directly via video link".... "sebastian Sebastian what's wrong love we are not getting through, what's happening luvvy? what's happening?

Sebastian "Sorry sir, sorry sir, the contractor video link technician has not turned up, I am trying to get a replacement in quickly "

Presenter: "Why has he not turned up ?"

Sebastian "cos he's a typical contractor scumbag.. he's taken a better paid job elsewhere.. "

Presenter: "doesnt he realise how important tonight is to so many people?"...

[Pondlife]

on fine form today DA.

[DodgyAgent]

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for attending this prestigious awards ceremony, and without further ado - I award the Dirty Stopout trophy to: DodgyAgent!

<applause>

"Thank ou thank you thank you . Can I just say what a pleasure it is to be invited to attend this wonderful occasion. I feel humbled just to be here let alone to be awarded the evenings top award."

"I would like to say that this award is not just about me, and I would particularly like to thank my parents. Whoever and wherever you are "sob" (fighting back the tears) I love you, all three of you. I would also like to thank all my friends and relatives who are unable to make it here tonight to share this wonderful occasion."

Awards Presenter: "well DA we have a surprise for you, because we have connected through to Belmarsh and brought together all your friends and family into the Belmarsh prison phone box to speak to you directly via video link".... "sebastian Sebastian what's wrong love we are not getting through, what's happening luvvy? what's happening?

Sebastian "Sorry sir, sorry sir, the contractor video link technician has not turned up, I am trying to get a replacement in quickly "

Presenter: "Why has he not turned up ?"

Sebastian "cos he's a typical contractor scumbag.. he's taken a better paid job elsewhere.. "

Presenter: "doesnt he realise how important tonight is to so many people?"...

[cojak]

We've got Molly Maids in cleaning the house for the benefit of the effing Hippopotamus, who arrives on Monday along with the lunatic aunt who is as mad as snake

The money she is spending is beyond belief

I cant argue with her as we have a simmering truce on account of me not getting back from my lunch until 5.00 am this morning.

Who are we talking about here?

You nearest and dearest wife?

Edit: clue's in the thread title...

[realityhack]

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you all for attending this prestigious awards ceremony, and without further ado - I award the Dirty Stopout trophy to: DodgyAgent!

<applause>

[DodgyAgent]

In that case a "simmering truce" is probably better than you could have expected. Are you sure lunch was the only thing you can't remember? Was there any lipstick on the collar?

It was on my (not that she would find out as she doesnt go there)

[Moose423956]

Can't remember

In that case a "simmering truce" is probably better than you could have expected. Are you sure lunch was the only thing you can't remember? Was there any lipstick on the collar?

[DodgyAgent]

That must have been some lunch! How many courses were there? 200?

Can't remember

[Moose423956]

We've got Molly Maids in cleaning the house for the benefit of the effing Hippopotamus, who arrives on Monday along with the lunatic aunt who is as mad as snake

The money she is spending is beyond belief

I cant argue with her as we have a simmering truce on account of me not getting back from my lunch until 5.00 am this morning.

That must have been some lunch! How many courses were there? 200?

[Sockpuppet]

Whipped.

[DodgyAgent]

We've got Molly Maids in cleaning the house for the benefit of the effing Hippopotamus, who arrives on Monday along with the lunatic aunt who is as mad as snake

The money she is spending is beyond belief

I cant argue with her as we have a simmering truce on account of me not getting back from my lunch until 5.00 am this morning.