IR Joke

[Dundeegeorge]

multiple choice

How do you stop a tax inspector from drowning?

a. take your foot off his head.
b. not how, why?
c. shoot him before you throw him in the water
d. release the crocodiles

[EternalOptimist]

What do get if you cross an IR inspector with a steam roller ?





a round of applause

[threaded]

Poor driver.

[DaveB]

Whats worse than a bus load of tax inspectors going over a cliff?

An empty bus going over a cliff.

[ChimpMaster]

That's about as funny as being locked out of your own house at 2am on a freezing cold Saturday morning after being mugged and beaten up on the way home.

Live in Peckham , do we?

[wendigo100]

That's good. Here's another one:

An IR inspector falls in front of a speeding train.

[Ivor1]

Abe was due a visit from the Inland Revenue inspector to go through some discrepancies in his accounts. Should he dress up or down for the meeting? He just didn’t know what was best so he asked both his accountant and his lawyer for their views.
His accountant told him, "Wear your worst clothes, shmattas even, and an old pair of shoes. Make him believe you’re very poor."
But his lawyer told him, "Wear your smartest suit with a good shirt, expensive tie and nice cuff-links. That way you won’t be intimidated."
Abe was confused and went to see his Rabbi about the conflicting advice he had been given. "Let me answer your dilemma with a story," said the Rabbi.
A woman, about to marry, asked her mother what she should wear on her wedding night. Her mother replied, "Put on a long nightgown that goes right up to your neck and wear woollen socks."
But when the woman asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. "Put on your sexiest, most see-through negligee."
"I don’t understand, Rabbi. What does this have to do with my interview with the Inland Revenue?" asked Abe.
"It means that it doesn't matter what you wear," replied the Rabbi, "you're going to get screwed anyway."