Some people respond the way they do because they are tired of numpties going in half baked and abusing the system which messes it up for the rest of us. Getting your house in order helps preserve the good reputation of contracting in general. The ones who bumble through it give us a bad name and that pisses us all off because it makes us a bigger target.
A fair summary is probably:
1. IR35 is a notoriously grey area and the only way most of us will ever really know if we are inside or outside is if we get investigated. If you are at all borderline, an investigation may result in you going to court to present your case. Certainly no one here will give you a definitive answer unless your case is particularly clear cut, eg you work for multiple clients at once and subcontract work to other people.
2. As we can see, there are professional organisations who can insure against the legal costs and cover the the cost of the tax owed in the event that HMRC win. You have to contact them directly and give them the full details of your circumstances so they can make a judgement. As with any insurance policy, it goes without saying that you have to be open and honest with them. Without seeing your exact contract terms and working practices, we can only give very general advice.
3. If you take reasonable steps to determine your IR35 status then this may count in your favour if you are ever found to be IR35 caught. You will have to pay up the tax you rightly owe but any decent defence team would use this to try and reduce the penalties you have to pay, possibly to zero. Contacting a professional organisation to get your contract and working practices reviewed would be a reasonable step, having a discussion on a forum wouldn't carry quite as much weight.
My advice:
- Do HMRC's online assessment to see if you are low, medium or high risk. The test result may not mean anything, but the test questions are very pertinent as this is what they will consider if you are ever investigated.
- Get your contract professionally reviewed and consider the recommendations
- Get insurance against a tax investigation so you have a professional team on your side to defend you
- Review your working practices with your client, tell them you have defined projects up front and you are not there to make the tea and be a general dogs body anymore. Give them a written statement (eg meeting minutes) confirming what you told them. Be businesslike and they will see that you have moved on and respect you for that.
- Moving forward, stick to your contract objectives. Don't be drawn in to becoming part and parcel of the organisation again.
- File all of the above away in a safe place and keep it for at least 6 years in case you ever get investigated. Referring to contemporary notes will carry a lot more weight in court than people's fuzzy recollections of how things (allegedly) were.
- Keep some cash in your war chest to cover any potential future tax liability if you lose an IR35 case
- Once you've got all this straight, stop worrying and get on with running your consultancy business
this thread will help newcomers like myself as it contains key answers to some of the questions many people would ask regarding IR35, so in that sense i dont consider myself as a complete beginner anymore 
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and thanks for your help
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