Post-baby Coitus

[bobsmithldn]

We had a baby in February. Since then - Mrs being knackered and so on - we've only managed it twice ...

Any tips?

Also, to get an idea of relationship problems, I'd like a poll on the frequency of the said subject post-first baby.

[pickle]

How?

How does she manage to fight you off if she is so knackered ?

[Fleetwood]

You're supposed to abstain from penetrative sex for six weeks after to let the minge heal.

During this time you can (based on personal experience) :

a) lick her out
b) have a tommy next to her
c) dans sa bouche
d) entre ses seins
e) watch a porn DVD
f) get yourself a new bird

hth

To answer the frequency question, a lack of libido on her part may well be her thinking that you don't fancy her any more 'cos she's put a few pounds on. Make sure she knows she still gives you the horn.

As for "being too tired", she doesn't have to do anything at all apart from lie on her front, as your engorged manhood powers in and out of her most secret place, filling her with your endless seed. Try that approach.

[Phoenix]

Perhaps your going about it the wrong way!

[MrsGoof]

Read it, understand the principles and then follow them no matter how hard it may seem.
SHold take less than a month to kick in.

Warning: Some people hate this book and believe it infringes on the babys rights. I believe that these people (if they've read it) have taken it litterally rather than understanding the content.

signed
Parent of 2 well behaved kids that have slept through the night from 8 weeks.

[bobsmithldn]

Cheers Fleetwood - the direct approach has always worked with her (being German) but not at the moment ... no comment re other tips I'm afraid, particularly getting another bird ... non comprende!

MrsGoof - yes, heard about that book but does it say anything about 'nani ...

[bobsmithldn]

Oh, ok then give no work to do and my last week at this shi*hole ...

You're supposed to abstain from penetrative sex for six weeks after to let the minge heal.

During this time you can (based on personal experience) :

a) lick her out *SHE'S TOO SHY*
b) have a tommy next to her *WHAT?*
c) dans sa bouche *SHE'S DOESNT' LIKE*
d) entre ses seins *SHE'S TOO SHY*
e) watch a porn *BEEN THERE, DONE THAT!*
f) get yourself a new bird *SHE'LL CHOP IT OFF - ALTHOUGH NOT PARTIAL TO BE A BIT OF YOU-KNOW-WHAT*

hth *NOT REALLY*

To answer the frequency question, a lack of libido on her part may well be her thinking that you don't fancy her any more 'cos she's put a few pounds on. Make sure she knows she still gives you the horn. *I DON'T BUT IT'S THE CHEAPER OPTION MAN!*

As for "being too tired", she doesn't have to do anything at all apart from lie on her front, as your engorged manhood powers in and out of her most secret place, filling her with your endless seed. Try that approach.

[Fleetwood]

Let me get this right :
She's too shy to let you go down on her or go between the tits and doesn't like it in her mouth.
She can't exactly have been a goer before the pregnancy.....

[bobsmithldn]

Let me get this right :
She's too shy to let you go down on her or go between the tits and doesn't like it in her mouth.
She can't exactly have been a goer before the pregnancy.....

Correct.

[Fleetwood]

Hmmmm.......so the childbirth has made an already barren sex situation worse.
Not good, not good at all.
I have never been in this situation and cannot offer any advice, sorry.