The too many boyos with too much time and not enough imagination thread.

[Pondlife]

Once upon a time, in a land far away, lived a beautiful, golden-haired princess. Her name was Susan.
Susan longed to be wed. She dreamed of the day when she could finally escape the castle in which she was held by her old, wicked father.

One day, a tall, handsome knight appeared under her bedroom window...

The problem that the knight faced was that although he was both tall and handsome, Susan's years of solitude with only her Jane Austin books for company had given her an unrealistic expectation of how the modern man might behave. Our hero the knight, who was bestowed his gong for inventing some new fangled widget, and who had turned up not on the traditional white steed but on a vespa wearing an addidas tracksuit had spent his years watching online pron rather than interacting with real women in a modern society....

[Mich the Tester]

The problem that the knight faced was that although he was both tall and handsome, Susan's years of solitude with only her Jane Austin books for company had given her an unrealistic expectation of how the modern man might behave. Our hero the knight, who was bestowed his gong for inventing some new fangled widget, and who had turned up not on the traditional white steed but on a vespa wearing an addidas tracksuit had spent his years watching online pron rather than interacting with real women in a modern society....

...while Susan was hampered in her development as an adult by a 300bps modem connection and having waited months for her first youpron film to load discovered she needed a new version of flash player which would take another month to load...

[doodab]

Once upon a time, in a land far away, lived a beautiful, golden-haired princess. Her name was Susan.
Susan longed to be rogered senseless. She dreamed of the day when she could finally escape the castle in which she was held by her old, wicked father.

One day, a tall, handsome knight appeared under her bedroom window...

<please feel free to complete. Make it as smutty as you like. >

FTFY

[mos]

(...) Jnr and he's only interested in what he can find of mine to shove down the loo Or to investigate why I've been sitting on the loo. They say there is no dignity in Childbirth - there is even less in raising an inquisitive toddler.

[Old Greg]

...while Susan was hampered in her development as an adult by a 300bps modem connection and having waited months for her first youpron film to load discovered she needed a new version of flash player which would take another month to load...

But she was comforted by the presence of her only friend, a verruca on which she had drawn a smiley face in black felt tip pen, who she called Uncle Jimmy.

[vetran]

...while Susan was hampered in her development as an adult by a 300bps modem connection and having waited months for her first youpron film to load discovered she needed a new version of flash player which would take another month to load...

I'm coming shouts the Knight, he clambers up the twisty twiny ivy encrusted tower that thrust majestically like a giant green phallus from the castle. His feet hit the cold stone, his arms crimson with scarlet blood caused by the rough stone walls and thorns encrusting Susan's prison. His muscles rippled

Susan gasped feeling the heat of his exertions across the room, she loosened her bodice to ease her beating heart and struggling lungs. "To hell with it!" she thought and ripped the restraining garment off. She stood there in her chemise, her body glistening and glowing with anticipation. The cool air and excitement causing her nipples to pucker awaiting firm lips to cool their engorged flesh. A small ripple of anticipation ran through her secret places and her knees went weak.

The Knight reached to his waist and slid his hand downward caressing his firm muscled torso, suddenly erect he whipped out a 128GB card and declared 'I have a copy of chromium and some dodgy pictures of a couple with their kit off'. Give me five minutes and I will have you surfing at full speed.

for the knight was ...........................

[Mich the Tester]

for the knight was ...........................

...Dell's regional sales representative, and although he had all the gear he couldn't install it and had to phone a helpdesk in Bangalore to ask someone called Rajesh who sounded like a Welshman to explain...

[SimonMac]

Spod is away... it's just me and Jnr and he's only interested in what he can find of mine to shove down the loo Or to investigate why I've been sitting on the loo. They say there is no dignity in Childbirth - there is even less in raising an inquisitive toddler.

Yep, still can't have a tulip in peace these days

[Pondlife]

...Dell's regional sales representative, and although he had all the gear he couldn't install it and had to phone a helpdesk in Bangalore to ask someone called Rajesh who sounded like a Welshman to explain...

As Rajesh, or William as he was better known to his customers, waited for the Sales Rep to reboot the PC for the third time his mind wandered to his favourite place. To the dreams and hopes he had for a better life outside of the relatively well paid air-conditioned office job. He'd seen Slumdog Millionaire five times and knew that it was possible. Rajesh had another job working at the call centre for Barclays and had written a program that would round off all the decimal pennies and place the money in a special account, just for him. The plan was fool proof and Rajesh congratulated himself daily on being the first to think of it...

[mudskipper]

As Rajesh, or William as he was better known to his customers, waited for the Sales Rep to reboot the PC for the third time his mind wandered to his favourite place. To the dreams and hopes he had for a better life outside of the relatively well paid air-conditioned office job. He'd seen Slumdog Millionaire five times and knew that it was possible. Rajesh had another job working at the call centre for Barclays and had written a program that would round off all the decimal pennies and place the money in a special account, just for him. The plan was fool proof and Rajesh congratulated himself daily on being the first to think of it...

But unfortunately the bank's rounding code had been written by Bob, and instead of rounding down it rounded up, leaving William's account forty-seven billion rupees in debt at the end of the first day.