Same old, Same old

[darmstadt]

This contract - turned up on the start date and the PC (with nice new big screen) was there along with an envelope with all my userids and passwords for everything from e-mail to all the systems I had to logon to. All I had to do was go across to personnel, get a photo taken and my id card was ready in 5 minutes.

Last project - turned up. PC and screen were there along with userids and passwords. Just had to get a pass to get in the building, took 5 minutes

The one before that - turned up. Envelope containing all relevant logins and passwords was handed to me. Just had to go to stores to get my laptop and personel to get a pass to get in the building

I don't recall ever having a problem, maybe its just me...(or should I utter it, Germany!)

[Mich the Tester]

This contract - turned up on the start date and the PC (with nice new big screen) was there along with an envelope with all my userids and passwords for everything from e-mail to all the systems I had to logon to. All I had to do was go across to personnel, get a photo taken and my id card was ready in 5 minutes.

Last project - turned up. PC and screen were there along with userids and passwords. Just had to get a pass to get in the building, took 5 minutes

The one before that - turned up. Envelope containing all relevant logins and passwords was handed to me. Just had to go to stores to get my laptop and personel to get a pass to get in the building

I don't recall ever having a problem, maybe its just me...(or should I utter it, Germany!)

Yep.

The Dutch used to work like the Germans, and now they work like the US. No surprises the economy's a pile of tulipe nowadays.

[ctdctd]

Well, yes WGAS, I can invoice.

But as MtT says, it's an appalling waste of resources as I'm not the only one stuck here.

Most of my gigs have been for smaller outfits - turn up, do the job, everyone happy.

This time, no one is bothered if anything happens.
I guess they are like contractors only on a larger scale as the end end end client is the public sector - so, so long as they can invoice, WGAS.

[ctdctd]

Day 6 of browsing the internet.

Got some forms to fill in yesterday - looks like they were the standard new starter ones that should have been done on day 1.

How do these incompetent muppets survive.

[tractor]

...

Well, for the individual it's OK, but it's actually bloody appalling if you stop to think about it.

There are thousands of IT jobs disappearing from Europe due to offshoring and outsourcing, which supposedly happens because 'management' want to save money. All the while, if you start a contract anywhere in Europe it can take weeks before you can do any work because large companies and government agencies have complicated and inefficient 'workflow processes' to get you an account and a PC. All the while, money is being pissed up against the wall and idiot managermen are complaining that IT is costing too much, even though they themselves have pushed the costs up with their 19th century top-down management approaches, of which this is only one example.

Fine, WGAS if you can invoice, but look at the bigger picture and it's a fooking abominable disgrace.

Thus is ever was! HR/Provisioning are too busy getting their mouths around the latest 'talent management' concept, divesting their responsibility to managed service companies or otherwise shirking responsibility for their processes to actually get people on-board and equipped at the proper time.

Makes me laugh when they spend so much on ITIL and CMMI.

[NickFitz]

Started at very short notice at one place and IT declared that it would take two weeks to sort out a login and PC for me

The head of development had an "access all areas" keycard and had me follow him down to their lair in the basement, which was always kept locked. We walked in unannounced to find them all playing Counter-Strike.

My login and PC were sorted out by the head IT chap personally within twenty minutes

[norrahe]

Current clientco had desk, pc, phone and login on day one, am still reeling from the shock

[NotAllThere]

...How do these incompetent muppets survive.

They become contractors. Oh.. I see. You were talking about the client.

tbh - if there's no work to do, I tell 'em to give me a ring when they're ready; then go and do something more worthwhile.

[ctdctd]

They become contractors. Oh.. I see. You were talking about the client.

tbh - if there's no work to do, I tell 'em to give me a ring when they're ready; then go and do something more worthwhile.

Incompetent contractors - never (we must stick together or they'll all know)

Tempted to go home but muppets keep saying it will all be sorted very soon.

Got my time sheet login a few minutes ago so that job is done.

[Mich the Tester]

Thus is ever was! HR/Provisioning are too busy getting their mouths around the latest 'talent management' concept, divesting their responsibility to managed service companies or otherwise shirking responsibility for their processes to actually get people on-board and equipped at the proper time.

Makes me laugh when they spend so much on ITIL and CMMI.

This tulipe really gets on my nerves. It seems that every field of work has to have buzzwords, 'methodologies' and the one that really pisses me off; 'best practices' bloody hell, nothing is a 'best practice', you have practices that worked somewhere for somebody and might work for someone else in some other context, but nothing is a 'best practice' because firstly you don't know; there might be better practice somewhere that you don't know about yet, and secondly, the success or failure of any practice is context dependent.

Are we all idiots to need these protocols, processes and handbooks? My impression from the best projects I've worked on, but also the best sports teams I've played in is that if you put together a bunch of smart people who want to work together, and combine them with someone who can advise if things get difficult and can arrange the basics like workplaces etc, the 'process' and the 'strategy' and the 'methodology' all fall into place, and better still, a manner of working emerges that suits the context a hundred times better than some 'industry standard' or 'best practice'.