Originally posted by shaunbhoy
Paraguay are okay, but they will lose to England. England will then trounce Trinidad and Tobasco comfortably, and draw with Sweden, thus winning their group on goal difference.
Media hysteria will hit new and frenzied heights as they ease past Poland and draw either Holland or Argentina in the quarter finals. The sun will be giving away "Remember the Falklands" or "Clobber the Cloggies" paper hats and the Carling gnats-piss will be flowing like water. Millions will leave work early and gather round giant screens in city centres jingoistically belting out Jerusalem/Land of Hope and Glory/Rule Brittania/The Great Escape/Swing Low etc. armed with plastic cups full of very expensive yet ridiculously frothy warm lager.
England will then have a winning "goal" disallowed due to some large clumsy defender climbing all over the goalie and/or a defender at some set piece, and the match will end with Holland or Argentina holding their nerve and winning it on penalties. Dozens of arrests will take place, a slightly higher number than the reruns of the disallowed "goal", as England fans once again show the world they cannot hold their ale, and the show will end with a tearful Gary Lineker presenting a dreary collage of near-misses and what-might-have-been moments from the previous 2 hours during which England's forwards, presented with the first reasonable defensive unit they have faced in the competition, once again display the inescapable fact that they could not collectively hit a cow's arse with a banjo.
Some poor Match Official will spawn countless websites calling for his castration, and 2006 will thus be remembered as the year that only Scotland brought home a footballing trophy to these islands.
Media hysteria will hit new and frenzied heights as they ease past Poland and draw either Holland or Argentina in the quarter finals. The sun will be giving away "Remember the Falklands" or "Clobber the Cloggies" paper hats and the Carling gnats-piss will be flowing like water. Millions will leave work early and gather round giant screens in city centres jingoistically belting out Jerusalem/Land of Hope and Glory/Rule Brittania/The Great Escape/Swing Low etc. armed with plastic cups full of very expensive yet ridiculously frothy warm lager.
England will then have a winning "goal" disallowed due to some large clumsy defender climbing all over the goalie and/or a defender at some set piece, and the match will end with Holland or Argentina holding their nerve and winning it on penalties. Dozens of arrests will take place, a slightly higher number than the reruns of the disallowed "goal", as England fans once again show the world they cannot hold their ale, and the show will end with a tearful Gary Lineker presenting a dreary collage of near-misses and what-might-have-been moments from the previous 2 hours during which England's forwards, presented with the first reasonable defensive unit they have faced in the competition, once again display the inescapable fact that they could not collectively hit a cow's arse with a banjo.
Some poor Match Official will spawn countless websites calling for his castration, and 2006 will thus be remembered as the year that only Scotland brought home a footballing trophy to these islands.
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