Public Transport - Planes, Traines & Buses

[Diver]

And by the time I got back to the train on my Barclays bike I was very smelly. Maybe we need showers at the stations?

That's honest sweat. What I don't appreciate are people who only have a nodding acquaintance with hygiene products and water.

[amcdonald]

That's honest sweat. What I don't appreciate are people who only have a nodding acquaintance with hygiene products and water.

You've worked with IT contractors then

[Doggy Styles]

I used a train most days, and I find it refreshing to mix with the general public on a regular basis.

[hyperD]

Alternately known as traveling with the great unwashed.

As fare paying passengers, I believe that we have the right to travel in relative comfort without having to put up with the smelly unwashed oiks, People shouting loudly down mobile telephones and otherwise behaving in a noisome manner.

Certainly we should have the right to remove, or have removed these disgusting and irritating creatures.

I am getting tired of paying the cost of traveling 1st class to avoid the smelly ones, only to encounter the ignorant noisy phone wielding trash that are unfortunately everywhere including the so called 1st class and Quiet Carriages on the rail service.

And the seats are too cramped and carriages overcrowded in standard class

When I am fatigued and the bicycle effort is too great a burden, then one is faced with a short trip on the locomotive in the Executive Lounge of Erste Klasse with a work colleague of mine to the clientco - in order to avoid the infestation of chimney scuttlers, the smartphone incontinent and the Über-perfumed ones.

But not the vagabonded lurkers. Oh no, those sneaky shapeshifters are homing towards our comfort zone, a warm seat to micturate upon, before the guard tosses their twitching, bedraggled Sainsbury's bag clad corpses off at Basingstoke and Gomorrah.

No, the stinky ones that release their itchy lice minions from their pubic bonds to wreak misery upon our helpless souls, set loose their roped dogs of Rottweilergodammerung, infest our compartment with their Eau de Special Brew and to proclaim biblical damnations and hellish revelations and something about my mother.

There's no escape from the Scourge that is South West Trains.

God help us all.

[Pondlife]

Since you mentioned planes is the title;

1. If you rely on little wheels or need a trolley to move it, it ain't hand luggage. Get it checked in.
2. If the only way it will fit in the overhead compartment is by you ramming the fu<k out of other people's bags, it ain't hand luggage. Get it checked in.
3. When the nice lady who serves me wine and pretzels says turn off your phone, she doesn't mean turn it upside down as she walks past then continue texting.
4. Yes, an iPad is an electronic device. Turn it off.
5. If you are filling up a half pint glass with scotch in the lounge and dress like a pikey, we already assume that you work offshore. You don't need to tell everyone, really. Use your inside voice people!

[Ignis Fatuus]

You mean your client does not pay for a chauffeur driven limo?

I have my own but parkings the problem

If you actually had a driver, you would find that it is the parking rather than the driving that is the big advantage. You jump out, he parks it while you get on with your life.

[d000hg]

If you rely on little wheels or need a trolley to move it, it ain't hand luggage. Get it checked in.

Small cases are specifically designed to fit well in overhead compartments. Last thing one needs is an extra 30min hanging about after arriving on top of the 2hrs hanging about before take-off.

[Diver]

If you actually had a driver, you would find that it is the parking rather than the driving that is the big advantage. You jump out, he parks it while you get on with your life.

Perhaps I should get a driver for my Limo

[Pondlife]

Small cases are specifically designed to fit well in overhead compartments. Last thing one needs is an extra 30min hanging about after arriving on top of the 2hrs hanging about before take-off.

Yes, but how many will fit in the compartment? There's typically 3 seats on your row's side of the aisle. Plus all the acompanying laptop bags, hand bags and crap bought at the airport.

First guy fills the whole compartment, 2nd guy with equally 'small' bag stats jamming theirs in like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole.

It's rarely 30mins to get the bags off a commuter flight and there's no need to be there 2hrs beforehand.

[Diver]

Small cases are specifically designed to fit well in overhead compartments. Last thing one needs is an extra 30min hanging about after arriving on top of the 2hrs hanging about before take-off.

Fly Business or Flexi. Late checkin and fastrack.
and my carry on case always goes on the floor under the seat in front.

Sorted