Chocolate Teapot

[SimonMac]

Are we still allowed to say "As useful as a condom machine in the Vatican"?

I used to say "As useful as a pair of balls on the Pope" but it seems he needs a pair as they are checked during his election after the Pope Joan fiasco

[amcdonald]

I know someone who made a concrete canoe, whilst heavy it did float well

[d000hg]

I know someone who made a concrete canoe, whilst heavy it did float well

Yeah there are loads of concrete boats, even a few concrete yachts IIRC. Never heard of a concrete canoe before though.

[Churchill]

Fart_in_a_wetsuit

One_legged_man_in_an_arse_kicking_contest

How the **** are those two examples related apart from the fact that they both describe you?

[xoggoth]

A more interesting question may be whether a fart in a wetsuit

When I used to go potholing people used to pee in them too. We usually used to change back into normal clothes in a grotty little shed somewhere on the hillside. Phaw! Whatha stink.

but it seems he needs a pair as they are checked during his election after the Pope Joan fiasco

So Hitler would not have been allowed to be pope? That would have been most unfair.

[MarillionFan]

How the **** are those two examples related apart from the fact that they both describe you?

As useful as Churchill as a compere at a comedy night.