Health and Safety on the Stairs

[PAH]

Safety on the Stairs

Just write "I learnt how to use stairs when I was 2 years old, get a f****** proper job."

One HR knobhead at a recent contract came into the office we'd just been relocated to asking if we'd had a H&S survey done. I just laughed and said in a rather sarcastic tone "do you think it's safe for us to sit at these desks on these chairs".

He just tutted and pointed to the 4-way extension socket under a desk (used to power a couple of computers) saying that it wasn't "orientated correctly".

He'd gone by the time I'd finished pissing myself.

It's this kind of bollocks that make me determined never to go permie again. At least with contracting I can choose not to renew if the place is full of morons.

[Old Greg]

Just write "I learnt how to use stairs when I was 2 years old, get a f****** proper job."

Or just kick them down the stairs, break all their fingers and shout, 'Now fill out your form, you worthless ****.'

[Pondlife]

Current client has a dream that no one dies on site in a year.

It's never happened AFAIK.

[PAH]

Current client has a dream that no one dies on site in a year. It's never happened AFAIK.

I'm guessing it's not your average office environment.

[Old Greg]

I'm guessing it's not your average office environment.

It's like that wherever Pondy works.

[Pondlife]

I'm guessing it's not your average office environment.

Some bits are, others definitely not.

Global policy though.

[Pondlife]

It's like that wherever Pondy works.

My Mum says I'm special and that's why people treat me different.

[BoredBloke]

I ws told off at BP for not following the correct stairs H&S procedure. So I'm guessing that's where you are. The guy was actually sat down eating when he spotted me recklessly using my mobile on the stairs and not holding the hand rail.

[Support Monkey]

Many years ago i worked for a company and they were having a big health and safety blitz, one day a particularly hated regional manager turned up onsite during lunch time and proceeded to wonder around the workshop checking for issues while all the staff sat in the lunch room watching him, eventually he came across a hoover that had a frayed lead, checking that everyone was watching he produced a set of wire cutters and switched off the power point and proceeded to cut the offending lead

------- unfortunately he had turned off the wrong switch, the resulting bang threw him across the workshop and blew all the power

[darmstadt]

I always take the lift