Friday Poetry Corner

[RichardCranium]

As requested:

Alfred J P has asked for revival
Of a corner of this site for poetry, please.
So extract your juices of creative genius
And give your vocab glands a warm-handed squeeze.

Put hand to keyboard and show us your talents
In poetry, prose, in ditty or rhyme
And give us your wordage (or turgid old turdage)
To share us your feelings - so spare us your time.

[wobbegong]

As requested:

Alfred J P has asked for revival
Of a corner of this site for poetry, please.
So extract your juices of creative genius
And give your vocab glans a warm-handed squeeze.

Put hand to keyboard and show us your talents
In poetry, prose, in ditty or rhyme
And give us your wordage (or turgid old turdage)
To share us your feelings - so spare us your time.

FTFY

[thunderlizard]

I invoke the spirit of William McGonagall
To expound to you my personal chronicle.
On The Nineteenth of January of this year
I submitted two CT returns, perfectly clear.

The first Nov to Nov, the next just for December:
(this is necessary for a long period of accounts, remember).
Both tax returns were submitted online
and the balances showed up for both, as was fine.

Yesterday to me in the post there came through
a balance demand, for period 2.
And I assumed that the first was delayed in the post
as happens to many tax letters, if not most.

Sure enough this morning, addressed to me
came another brown letter from HMRC
But it was not the statement for which I did yearn -
'Twas a request to submit the other return!

The date on the letter, it shall be admitted,
was later than that when my returns were submitted!
To my telephone I did rush in a tizzy,
only to find that their number is busy!

[hyperD]

God made f**kwits big and small.
Some that creep and some that crawl.
The BBC employs them all…

[singhr]

I'm just back from lunch with a very nice bunch, of people from finance and risk,

while the company was fine and surroundings divine, the service was much less than brisk

I now pen you this ballad, as I chomp on my salad and dream of a lobster that's bisque

[sasguru]

There are some cretins on CUK
Others are common as muck
We have some bedwetters
But none of this matters
To those who don't give a f**k.