Fine. Don't hire me.

[craig1]

(NSFW language)

best of craigslist: Fine, Don't ******* Hire Me, You Can't Handle My tulip

[d000hg]

-I invented the moon.
-Atlantis was around til 1988, but sunk when I shot out of my mom's vagina like a silver bullet into a wolverine.
-I am also a wolverine.
-Had sex with the Spice Girls.
-The blowjob machine was originally my idea until that bastard Clint Eastwood stole it.
-I have prophetic visions of the apocolypse.
-Watched the movie "Juwanna Mann" at least 18 times. Juwanna Mann (2002) - IMDb
-Created a new genre of dance in which people get so into it that radiation waves pulsate off of them, I like to call this the microrave.
-I reverse engineered a door, I now know how it works.
-When I was 8, a frisbee flew into my backyard and I blew it up with my mind.
-My brother is the Eiffel Tower
-Direct descendant of Beowulf
-Can make weapons out of anything, very useful in a hostile work environment
-Beat my pornography addiction when I was 19
-Proficient in Microsoft Office and Photoshop

Nice. Is it Threaded?

[RichardCranium]

I recognise that CV. I interviewed him in the 1990s for an Oracle Financials role. He wanted £120 per hour, minimum. And he expected someone else to key in any SQL that might be required.

I told him to eff off.

He said he could arrange I get a blow job if that would help change my mind.

He was a big, fat bloke.

I showed him the door and went without the blowjob.

He recognised what the door was, but didn't make a weapon out of it.