Experts have stated that the strain of the bird flu virus has mutated in Turkey but is not passable between humans yet. I disagree, I'm just recovering from a bout of flu with some weird symptoms. I can only eat Tesco wild bird seed, I cancelled my flights to Rome as I get fly there myself and I've just told my boss that he'll have to excuse me as the sun comes up as I'll need to go into the car park and sing a song!

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