How about:
BZZZZZZZZZ
Pondlife: Hello?
Delivery Boy: Delivery for you innit?
PL: Splendid, I'll open the door. I'm on the 5th floor.
Boy: I's not carryin yo stuff up dem stairs. Dis is heavy sh*t.
PL: Young man, you're paid to deliver to my residential address, which is clearly not down there.
Boy: Listen man, dat like 4 tausand steps. Come git yo sh*t, I needs yo to sign fo it.
PL: I'll give you five pounds to bring it up?
Boy: Yeah man dat's cool. Gimme 2 sex, innit.
Pondlife: Hello?
Delivery Boy: Delivery for you innit?
PL: Splendid, I'll open the door. I'm on the 5th floor.
Boy: I's not carryin yo stuff up dem stairs. Dis is heavy sh*t.
PL: Young man, you're paid to deliver to my residential address, which is clearly not down there.
Boy: Listen man, dat like 4 tausand steps. Come git yo sh*t, I needs yo to sign fo it.
PL: I'll give you five pounds to bring it up?
Boy: Yeah man dat's cool. Gimme 2 sex, innit.
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