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Wouldnt this be a good idea for the basis of your speach?
"As I have no experience I decided to put this out on an internet forum for advice. However I had not taken into account that the forum in question is populated by rejects from the IT crowd <expand the description of internet nerds>.
Here are some of the publishable replies."
You can make it up as you go along from there. Be as rude and nasty as you like and blame it on us and then put in a whitty reason why you wont be doing as suggested.
I am not qualified to give the above advice!
The original point and click interface by
Smith and Wesson.
Step back, have a think and adjust my own own attitude from time to time
If the proceedings are following the "traditional" route the groom will do all the "thanks", finishing off with thanking the bridesmaids and saying something nice about them.
The best man would then start their speech by saying thank you to the groom for this on behalf of the bridesmaids.
At least that's what happened at the last wedding I went to. YMMV
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