Dilemma

[EternalOptimist]

Atheist CV

5 yrs experience SQL server DBA
5 yrs experience Oracle DBA
3 yrs experience database design & data migration
1 year building reporting scheduling tool to automate report production
team leader
project leader
100 % extension to every contract I ever did
payrise at EVERY contract renewal


Chico CV

Although I have none of the skills or experience that the advertised position requires I feel that that I can still fulfill the project requirements and meet your deadlines.
Knowing nothing about anything has ever stopped me before as my referees will confirm(ref AA Gabriel and J Baptist attached)
I can guarantee that whatever technical, HR, Analytic, Platform or structural problems we encounter that not only can I pray to get the optimal answer but the answer will come from a source that not only has all the answers but had all the solutions billions of years ago, at about the same time that he created all your existing problems.
If my Omniscient pal is not available on the praying help line(premium rate during office hours) I can always refer to the manual, which, I am afraid, only the select few can decipher properly.

[Chico]

Ah....well, ahem....that puts a slight different spin on it

Oh well, I am an idiot, so what do you expect

Wage you know I only have love and respect for you.. you know that. You are a Top Man!!

[sasguru]

Twats like yourself and EO think by introducing a religious element you mock me NO - you are mocking yourselves. The contempt I have for your ilk cannot be overstated.

We don't really have to mock you. Your posts do that all by themselves.

[EternalOptimist]

I really doubt that Jesus ever called anyone a tw@t

People mock you because you are a fool. My brother is a vicar, never mocked him in my life.

You set a bad example Chico. Give it up.

[Francko]

You are a Top Man!!

He heard he was a submissive one indeed. That's how he treats you indeed?

[Chico]

Oh dear - what a bunch of fools the two of you are. Take a hint and do one...

Edit: The two fools are (for the avoidance of doubt) the self styled inadequate atheist guru nincompoop and the pleb who claims his brother is some sort of priest.

[DodgyAgent]

I need some help from the our assembled bunch of IT professionals.What are the pro /cons of going for an inhouse developed IT solution compared with an off the shelf package? At the moment its all conceptual high level stuff so interested in general advice and any experiences in support of any particular option.

Go for an agile development of your own, it is all the rage, and if it doesnt work you can blame the business as they input very heavily into the development process.

And you will be needing some contract developers

[WageSlave]

Wage you know I only have love and respect for you.. you know that. You are a Top Man!!

Gee...<shuffles feet>...thanks

[WageSlave]

He heard he was a submissive one indeed. That's how he treats you indeed?

Eh?

[Chico]

Go for an agile development of your own, it is all the rage, and if it doesnt work you can blame the business as they input very heavily into the development process.

And you will be needing some contract developers

Well its looking like 60 developers will soon be on the bench for a while. (mixture of perm, consultants and dare I say it contractors).