Divorce while a contractor?

[SallyAnne]

married with kids and flirting with someone else you must accept it will make people do crazy things.

Are you lot ******* insane?!!!

When was flirting something which was this bad?

Fu*king hell - yous are one step away from having women hide their faces in public!

Is this a Jesusy thing or something? Should the wife be saying 10 hale Mary's now for having unclean thoughts? Whereas the husband only has to say a little apology, cause after all, it was her dirty mind that made him act that way, the evil Eve-like temptress!!!

Burn the witch!!

[MaryPoppins]

Yes they were involved. Mrs BP insisted. So I used every trick in the book : and there are alot. 8 months later she had not got a penny. I offered her 8 months worth of cash. She saw common sense.

Actually I did not use too many tricks : but I would have. Basically they got my calculations wrong and wanted 5% more from me than was right. I complained : they said just pay what you think is correct and we will sort out the mess later! What a load of numpties!

Just to confirm : I despise men who dont pay for their kids. But there is a right and a wrong way of going about these things.

I am lucky : 99% of the time CSA get their way. No suprise they have caused around 80 men to commit suicide. f**kers.

Have you had dealings with the CSA?

I am going to be faced with no option but no use them, and am getting increasingly nervous about it.

[gingerjedi]

Are you for real?

So you think it's her fault that he got the knife out?

And you think at that point...at the point where your other half turns so wierd that he downs a bottle of whiskey and takes a knife to (thankfully) himself, that you shoudl leave him alone in the house with 3 kids under 7?!

Have a word with yourself man.

Give the guy a break FFS, he had a silly moment that he obviously deeply regrets.

I’m surprised you are so ready to right him off and condemn him and his kids to a life of misery while there’s still a chance (however small) to save things.

[Pickle2]

I’m surprised you are so ready to right him off and condemn him and his kids to a life of misery while there’s still a chance (however small) to save things.

You saying that anyone not raised in a two parent happy clappy family is condemnd to a life of missery then?

I beg to differ!

[Cyberman]

Bloody hell!

She's doing the right thing - you sound like a loon mate. You do know that's not normal behaviour dont you? Just for finding a few test messages? (Regardless of what you were doing looking through her phone in the first place!!!)

Stay out the house, you're not in any state to salvage anything - you'll just make things worse for your kids.
Go and see a solicitor, and get things divided up as quickly and easiy as possible.
Then put your life back together, and go and see someone about your psychological issues.

I read a very interesting article yesterday about 'male post-natal depression'. Apparently, 10% of fathers suffer from this. It would appear to me that the OP has also been through this, so perhaps a little sympathy and understanding is in order, not just for mothers, but also for fathers. We are all human and thus all need attention and love in our lives.

Give him credit. He has recognised his error, and I am pretty sure that he knows that he must not do that again. Everybody deserves a second chance, especially in these awful circumstances.

[Cyberman]

Give the guy a break FFS, he had a silly moment that he obviously deeply regrets.

I’m surprised you are so ready to right him off and condemn him and his kids to a life of misery while there’s still a chance (however small) to save things.

WHS !!

[Platypus]

Are you lot frolicking insane?!!!

When was flirting something which was this bad?

Erm, when she asks for a divorce, as Mrs pleomax has now requested.

I'd be VERY interested to hear how you'd react if Mr SA had a "special" lady friend in whom he confided all his hopes, fears and dreams, exchanged explicit text messages and phone calls. I'm sure you'd be just fine with it, especially when he announces that in fact he wants to divorce you.

[BrilloPad]

Are you lot frolicking insane?!!!

When was flirting something which was this bad?

Fu*king hell - yous are one step away from having women hide their faces in public!

Is this a Jesusy thing or something? Should the wife be saying 10 hale Mary's now for having unclean thoughts? Whereas the husband only has to say a little apology, cause after all, it was her dirty mind that made him act that way, the evil Eve-like temptress!!!

Burn the witch!!

Why do you keep making this a sexist thing?

If a man is married and has an affair and she does crazy things then he must share some of the blame.

[BrilloPad]

You saying that anyone not raised in a two parent happy clappy family is condemnd to a life of missery then?

I beg to differ!

I was raised in a one parent family : my father died.

But it is a fact that children raised by 2 parents, on the whole, do far better than 1 parent families.

[SallyAnne]

Hi Pheonix,

Can I ask you a few questions please?

I spent a long time last night getting my head round my true feelings for her and the children which I have kept buried for so long and other distractions have kept me from saying them.

I think is possibly the clearest indication on the true state of your marriage, and your mind. Why didn't you already know your true feelings towards your wife and your children??
Has this been a violent relationship Pheonix? There's obviously been control issues there, but has it been worse than just control?

I am going to tell her how I feel and my feelings for her and how I have been neglecting her, now is a time for reconciliation.

Yeah good luck with that. You're telling her that it's time to reconcile. You still have no respect for her do you?

I want this to work, and will continue to try to show her how I cherish her as a friend/wife/mother and the good things she does and continues to do until the heart in my chest beats no more.

Why do you use language like that? It's just not real?? People dont speak like that. Any bloke on this board who genuinely loves his wife, can just say that. You have said it here in such a oldy-worldy way, like you think that's what you should be saying. It just doesn't sound genuine.

What's wrong with you, seriously? You might aswell just spill the beans totally - the anonamous venting might actually help you. No holds barred, etc.