Sometimes, life is pretty tulipty.

[TimberWolf]

The best thing to do is to talk about it.

In my opinion it's better not to seek and nurture feelings of self pity and just get on with life. I can't say I am a big fan of the way grief is handled in our society generally. As tragic and as emotional a loss can be, I tend to prefer to just move on ASAP. But pity, whether from self or others, has never been an attractive emotion to me unless it's combined with actual practical assistance.

[snaw]

In my opinion it's better not to seek and nurture feelings of self pity and just get on with life. I can't say I am a big fan of the way grief is handled in our society generally. As tragic and as emotional a loss can be, I tend to prefer to just move on ASAP. But pity, whether from self or others, has never been an attractive emotion to me unless it's combined with actual practical assistance.

You're entitled to your opinion TW. I posted this not in the hope of receiving some pity - I'm not feeling particularly sorry for myself - but because I find talking about stuff cathartic, as troll put it. Don't really feel like talking to my mates about it as most of them know her and it's not my place to tell them, and my wife is feeling crappy enough as it is.

I don't particularly like your approach, and think holding all that crap in and 'getting on with it' is worse for you than venting/talking/whatever. But that works for me and I don't assume it's right for you.

[TimberWolf]

You're entitled to your opinion TW. I posted this not in the hope of receiving some pity - I'm not feeling particularly sorry for myself - but because I find talking about stuff cathartic, as troll put it. Don't really feel like talking to my mates about it as most of them know her and it's not my place to tell them, and my wife is feeling crappy enough as it is.

I don't particularly like your approach, and think holding all that crap in and 'getting on with it' is worse for you than venting/talking/whatever. But that works for me and I don't assume it's right for you.

You're welcome to talk about it, but like it or not you will have to move on eventually. You don't necessarily need to 'hold crap in' if you can prevent it taking an emotional hold of you. It's literally all in the mind and extensive grieving may not necessarily be good or alleviate the condition, but rather intensify it.

[EternalOptimist]

. Don't really feel like talking to my mates about it as most of them know her and it's not my place to tell them, and my wife is feeling crappy enough as it is.

But you are talking to your mates. We are your cyber mates, the contractor band of brothers.



Sad to hear about all this Snaw, good luck mate.

[cojak]

It's all about the recognition of your own mortality.

It has/will happen to us all snaw....