Police came round tonight....

[Cyberman]

Wish I was laughing - I was scared out of my wits tonight, starting to get beyond amusing, he is a dangerous man.

When he first moved in he pushed a woman to the pavement trying to escape him and told the elderly people to f-off as they tried to help her!

Sounds like he really does not care about anything the police will try....

He doesn't care because he knows that if he kills you he will only serve six years, while his wife and kids will be secure on state benefits. While he's in nick he can get access to as many drugs as he likes, watch tv, eat excellent food, save money and do some 'banjoing' of fellow inmates.

[EternalOptimist]

banjo
a sausage or bacon banjo is ver ver nice in the a.m.
george formby was good on the banjo

in this context though, I think the meaning is clear, a good thumping.

It wont be much consolation if you are scared, but if he was going to assault you, he would not have put a joke ticket on your car, he would have just done it.
There are ways of dealing with bullies, next time you confront him try to get some numbers around you, friends or relatives, a few noisy women are usually good, they will draw attention to him and the fact that he isnt actually doing anything. Bullies hate that.

If he isnt a bully and he does give you a good banjoing, I recommend the tomato soup through one of those wiggly straws.

[The Lone Gunman]

I think you will find to banjo means to thump. See if you can find the attemted terrorist attack on Glasgow airport interviews. That nice Scottish chap saying how they were trying to detain the culprit but this guy came out of nowhere and banjoed him. The term usualy means to knock out with one punch IIRC.

[Flubster]

As it's wilmslow we're talking about, I prefer the former explanation.

[Peoplesoft bloke]

Wish I was laughing - I was scared out of my wits tonight, starting to get beyond amusing, he is a dangerous man.

When he first moved in he pushed a woman to the pavement trying to escape him and told the elderly people to f-off as they tried to help her!

Sounds like he really does not care about anything the police will try....

Why are you worrying? Just like that bogus ticket name, you've made the whole thing up.

[MarillionFan]

To banjo someone is a Glaswegian term meaning to hit them a single hard blow

See you Jimmy

Has he been inside, does he have some hard mates, are you going to find yourself swimming with the fishies.

Alas poor Wilmslow....

IMHO, never start an argument with someone unless you are the person who will finish it!

[Wilmslow]

Well, not swimming with fishes - as yet

Police came around just as I was arriving at home, perfect timing.

Listened, the fact I am the homewatch co-ordinator helped, they then wanted to see the mafia man.

As the policeman was going out of my house, the mafia dude went to his van and drove off, appearing back in 5 mins once the copper had gone!

The copper normally works in Colshaw, a rough Manchester overspill, even he had not heard of banjo......

Thankfully his mum (who lives at home with him!) saw the police leaving, and was looking all 'bella mamma' as old Italian mother look at the window.

Not sure what will give him more grief - the earache his mum will give him, or the police when they visit him later on!

[Wilmslow]

Just at the end of my road going to the gym - saw the police car return to my house, so, doubled back home.

Policeman currently in the neighbours house. His mum is also inside.

Could get interesting......

[DiscoStu]

You seem to have us confused with people who give a tulip.

[Diver]

You seem to have us confused with people who give a tulip.

Shut up!

I hate missing the end (Even B movies)

Keep us up to date Wilmslow.

PS. Did you sell the car yet & for How much? (I haven't checked ebay recently)