The tight gits thread ...

[Ardesco]

Make people think ye have a dog by walking around the local park carrying a lead and a small plastic bag of sh|te.

How does this save you money ?

[EternalOptimist]

Save money on haircuts by getting cancer and going for the chemo option





igmc

[Lucy]

I've got one; pretend you are 'Chasing the Aurora' and set up some donation sites...

(I wonder if he is allowed to use the internet in hospital?)

[johnreid]

How does this save you money ?

Nae need for a dog licence.

[Ardesco]

Save money on haircuts and shaving by cutting off all hair and hen inflicting numerous cuts on your head and face. Enough slashes should scar you sufficiently to ensure no more hair grows.

[Denny]

Intead of signing up to the local gym, try tossing away the breadmaker and make your bread using the manual kneading method instead. Ten minutes of dough pummelling and punching and pushing and folding will burn off heaps of calories and will do a much better job of toning your biceps and triceps than any amount of weights or resistance equipment.

[EternalOptimist]

Save money on beer by becoming a bird, wear a low cut top, and get blokes to buy yer ale.

[Board Game Geek]

Pee in the toilet sink instead of the toilet. The sink is ergonometrically designed for the purpose and it takes almost no water to flush.

Didn't DA have a similar problem with the el-cheapo Eastern European staff he hired recently ?

[johnreid]

I can see yer getting intae this, Denny.

[realityhack]

Forget expensive weight-loss programmes - eat raw pork or rancid tuna. The subsequent food poisoning/diarrhoea will enable you to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.